Wednesday, January 16, 2008

Nothing says "I love you" like telling her she needs a bath

Why don't men understand women? And why don't women understand men?

Because we think different.

Gift soap, for example.

Women seem to love that stuff. Otherwise, there'd be no such thing as Bath and Body Works or Bed, Bath & Beyond.

The other day, The Wife and I were in Hell-Mart, and I saw some Valentine's Day gift packs.

Soap.

Yes, soap.

When I get soap, I get Lifebuoy or Safeguard or Dial or something. I don't know. It's soap. It's used for bathing. Or showering.

It's soap.

Soap.

Nothing more than soap.

But, I think that because I'm a guy.

Gals don't think that way. They like stuff all smelly and perfume-y and such.

I don't get it.

If someone gave me soap as a gift, I'd think they're trying to tell me something. Like I need to wash my ass.

But give a woman soap, and she thinks it's sweet.

Unless you give her a bar of Lifebuoy.

I don't think I'll give The Wife a bar of Lifebuoy. Unless I want to wind up face down in a tub of water.

5 comments:

  1. Very True, stick with the "fancy soap" if you want to make nice.

    ReplyDelete
  2. LOL!

    I wonder what would happen if you bought some basic lye soap? ;)

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sorta Blogless Sunday Pinup...

    Happy Sunday! The Sun is shining, the geese are honking, the fox is not quite sure of the deal with the ice to get to the geese, and it a wee bit cold. Just another fantastic day in America. This pinup should warm ye up. The artist is Greg Hildebran...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Women give guys smelly stuff - and yes, it's usually what we would prefer that you smell like.
    Consider it like a dog, marking it's territory... er, well.

    So what would you rather she smell like? Teach's lye soap, or that sweet stuff in the package?

    ReplyDelete
  5. Oh, please understand that I want the nice smell. I just don't understand the packaging of soap as a gift.

    I think soap belongs in the same category as toothpaste and deodorant. Essentials for polite society and personal hygiene, but not in a heart-shaped box like it's made of chocolate.

    Hmmm. Chocolate soap. I bet Ralphie wouldn't have gone blind from having his mouth washed out with that.

    ReplyDelete

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