Tuesday, February 8, 2005

Headline News 2005-02-08

From ABC News:
Man Arrested for Lawyer Jokes Cleared
Not Guilty By Reason Of Sanity

From ABC News:
Pilot in Trouble for Copter Pizza Delivery
Still took 31 minutes, so pizza was free

From ABC News:
Ohio Man Accused of Stealing House
Thief captured when neighbors saw chimney protruding from his pocket

From ABC News:
Prank Calls Spook 'Other' Clintons
Victim: "I'd change my name if it wasn't for the oral sex from the fat chicks"

From ABC News:
Calif. Town May Ban Cosmetic Pet Surgery
Cat face-lifts will be illegal

From ABC News:
Stocks Mostly Unchanged Before Cisco Earns
Duncan Renaldo expects check in mail any day now

From ABC News:
Using Power Plants to Produce Cheap Water
Should cost less than expensive water

From ABC News:
Sweet Drinks Help Some Preschoolers Pack on Pounds
Study shows kids who use Kool-Aid to wash down a pack of Twinkies are fat

From ABC News:
How Safe Is Your Local Hospital?
Study shows hospital fine, patients at risk

From ABC News:
Britney Spears Sues Insurance Companies
Refused To Sell Her Skank Insurance

From ABC News:
'Deep Throat' to be re-released in U.S. theaters
William Rehnquist in title role

From CNN:
Once John Boy, now a spy
Billy, Robert D. Raiford suspected as much

From CNN:
Preacher guilty of stealing from hundreds of black churches
Spent millions on whiskey, gambling, prostitutes; rest of money was squandered

From The Washington Post:
For Spammers, Worm Turns a Profit
Will need money for hospital bill if I catch up with them

From CBS News:
New Role For Bush Adviser Rove
Dark Lord of the Sith

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