Thursday, July 14, 2011

How we got in this mess in the first place

I have a post up at IMAO. It's simply me retelling the story of the bathroom remodeling that you've already read about here. But it's written from an after-the-fact perspective.

Plus, I use it as a parable.

It's okay to go read it.

Thursday, July 7, 2011

How many Internets is enough?

You remember Barack Obama, right?

He was that idiot that a lot of other idiots went and elected to the presidency. You remember. Sure you do.

Anyway, he's still around. Not very relevant -- it's hard to be that incompetent and still be relevant -- but still around.

According to Politico, he said that schools need more "internets."

That makes me wonder: how many internets is enough?

Maybe we could have one that liberals could use. Them and Europe. Liberals love Europe. They forget that 235 years ago we fought a war so we wouldn't have to do things the way Europe does. But, being idiots, the liberals forget things like that.

Anyway, let's have some internets set aside for them. Then, we won't have to put up with trolls on our Internet. Except the RONPAUL!!!1!!!! worshippers. We could keep the libertarians, too, I suppose. But those liberaltarians -- the liberal version of libertarians -- can go with them.

Maybe some internets set aside for cats. I see a lot of the Internet taken up by cats. Let's move them to their own. Not as banishment, like for liberals and their kind, but so that we can keep them all in one place, you know, to keep up with them. When we need a good LOLCAT or OMGCAT or PIANOKITTEH fix, we'll know where to go. And when we don't, they aren't using up all our bandwidth.

Oh, and one for spammers. They need their own bunch of internets. When they start buying each other's Viagra or Rolex watches or move each other's money out of Nigeria, they'll be self-supporting and not bothering us.

What other internets are needed?

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Less remodeling

After further review...

Wife has decided that maybe we'll cut the remodeling short.

It all started when she decided to make everything match a $10 shower curtain she liked.

So, after new floors and new paint, she decided we needed to do a little more.

That "little more" meant replacing the toilet since the tank was cracked. She decided to get one like she always wanted: chair height, dual flush, slightly different color. So, we did.

And, of course, we needed a new vanity top. So, we did.

And, of course, that meant a new faucet. So, we did.

And, since nothing else matched the faucet, new towel racks, toilet paper holder, and such. So, we did.

And, since she wanted a walk-in shower instead of a tub, that meant ...

As I explained earlier, that meant new shower. Which meant shower doors. And that $10 shower curtain that started it all would be replaced.

She thought about that. Plus, she did a quick total of how much it had all cost to date, and how much it would cost to replace the tub with a shower.

So, no shower. Not this year, at least.

Which means, once I get a shower curtain rod that matches the faucet in the sink, we're done.

And no more long trips to the other side of the house at 3:00 AM.

Monday, July 4, 2011

July 4, 2011

The 235th birthday of our country, it may be a good time to re-read this document:
IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.

He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.
He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Georgia:
Button Gwinnett
Lyman Hall
George Walton

North Carolina:
William Hooper
Joseph Hewes
John Penn

South Carolina:
Edward Rutledge
Thomas Heyward, Jr.
Thomas Lynch, Jr.
Arthur Middleton

Massachusetts:
John Hancock

Maryland:
Samuel Chase
William Paca
Thomas Stone
Charles Carroll of Carrollton

Virginia:
George Wythe
Richard Henry Lee
Thomas Jefferson
Benjamin Harrison
Thomas Nelson, Jr.
Francis Lightfoot Lee
Carter Braxton

Pennsylvania:
Robert Morris
Benjamin Rush
Benjamin Franklin
John Morton
George Clymer
James Smith
George Taylor
James Wilson
George Ross

Delaware:
Caesar Rodney
George Read
Thomas McKean

New York:
William Floyd
Philip Livingston
Francis Lewis
Lewis Morris

New Jersey:
Richard Stockton
John Witherspoon
Francis Hopkinson
John Hart
Abraham Clark

New Hampshire:
Josiah Bartlett
William Whipple

Massachusetts:
Samuel Adams
John Adams
Robert Treat Paine
Elbridge Gerry

Rhode Island:
Stephen Hopkins
William Ellery

Connecticut:
Roger Sherman
Samuel Huntington
William Williams
Oliver Wolcott

New Hampshire:
Matthew Thornton
We shouldn't limit our reading -- or understanding -- of this document for anniversaries such as today.

Friday, July 1, 2011

Testing Shakespeare

Forget the economy. Forget the, what is it now, 4 wars? Or 5 wars? Forget about the high level of unemployment. Forget the high level of taxes.

Some people want to know about the things that are really important. Like if William Shakespeare was a stoner.

There have been articles at Time, Fox News, and other places, about this. And they want to dig up the Bard of Avon to find out.

But really, all you have to do is look at his body of work, compared to the work others, and determine if this is a fool's errand.

Compare this passage:
To be, or not to be, that is the question: Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer The slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, Or to take arms against a sea of troubles And by opposing end them. To die—to sleep, No more.
To this passage:
Dave's not here.
Okay, let's compare Shakespeare's work to something more recent than Cheech and Chong. Like this:
We are such stuff As dreams are made on; and our little life Is rounded with a sleep.
To this
Hope and Change!
Which of these were more likely to have been written ... or repeated ... by a stoner?

There's more.

Which is more likely to have been written by a stoner? This:
Hath not a Jew eyes? Hath not a Jew hands, organs, dimensions, senses, affections, passions; fed with the same food, hurt with the same weapons, subject to the same diseases, heal'd by the same means, warm'd and cool'd by the same winter and summer, as a Christian is? If you prick us, do we not bleed? If you tickle us, do we not laugh? If you poison us, do we not die? And if you wrong us, do we not revenge?
Or this:
The borders of Israel and Palestine should be based on the 1967 lines
I don't think it's Shakespeare they need to be testing.