Friday, December 25, 2015

Christmas 2015

The Gospel of Luke, Chapter 2
  1. And Joseph also went up from Galilee, out of the city of Nazareth, into Judaea, unto the city of David, which is called Bethlehem; (because he was of the house and lineage of David
  2. To be taxed with Mary his espoused wife, being great with child.
  3. And so it was, that, while they were there, the days were accomplished that she should be delivered.
  4. And she brought forth her firstborn son, and wrapped him in swaddling clothes, and laid him in a manger; because there was no room for them in the inn.
  5. And there were in the same country shepherds abiding in the field, keeping watch over their flock by night.
  6. And, lo, the angel of the Lord came upon them, and the glory of the Lord shone round about them: and they were sore afraid.
  7. And the angel said unto them, Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy, which shall be to all people.
  8. For unto you is born this day in the city of David a Saviour, which is Christ the Lord.
  9. And this shall be a sign unto you; Ye shall find the babe wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
  10. And suddenly there was with the angel a multitude of the heavenly host praising God, and saying,
  11. Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace, good will toward men.

Thursday, December 24, 2015

The Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house
Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,
Had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow
Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!
On, Comet! on, Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky;

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh full of Toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my head, and was turning around,
Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,
And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of Toys he had flung on his back,
And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes—how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,
That shook when he laughed, like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,
And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like the down of a thistle,

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night."

-- Clement Clarke Moore, 1822

Wednesday, December 9, 2015

Good Timing, Geek Timing

The timing is right, at least.

Doctor Who has ended its run in time for ... Star Wars.

In case you hadn't heard, they're making a new Star Wars movie. You'd think that would have made the news, right? Well, they are. And it's coming out next week or something. Here's the trailer. Sort of.


[The YouTube: Honest Trailers]

I'm still not sure if I'm going to go to a theater and see it. Especially since it leaked that Kylo Ren is really Jar Jar underneath the getup. So, I'm still wavering on going.

Anyway, what to do until next Thursday? I could re-watch this season's Doctor Who, I suppose. Yeah. That'll work. I'm watching Doctor Who again. I know I won't be disappointed with that.

Friday, December 4, 2015

A question



Just wondering...

Last month, I saw a lot of Tricolor overlays all over social media. So, where are the Old Glory overlays on Facebook and such?

Thursday, November 26, 2015

Washington’s Thanksgiving Proclamation

Thanksgiving Proclamation


Issued by President George Washington, at the request of Congress, on October 3, 1789
By the President of the United States of America, a Proclamation.

Whereas it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favor; and—Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me “to recommend to the people of the United States a day of public thanksgiving and prayer, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:”

Now, therefore, I do recommend and assign Thursday, the 26th day of November next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favor, able interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquillity, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed; for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enabled to establish constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted; for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge; and, in general, for all the great and various favors which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations, and beseech Him to pardon our national and other trangressions; to enable us all, whether in public or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shown kindness to us), and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally, to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as He alone knows to be best.

Given under my hand at the City of New York the third day of October in the year of our Lord 1789.

Go. Washington

Monday, November 23, 2015

Happy Doctor Who Day

Geek alert.

It's Doctor Who's birthday. The TV show. You know how all you comic book fans with your Batman and your Deadpool and your Richie Rich...

Well, Doctor Who fans are just as bad. This is the anniversary of the first episode of the show, which aired November 23, 1963 in the UK. And most Doctor Who fans, particularly those in the US, didn't watch it. But we don't care. We're fans. So, we want to wish The Doctor and Doctor Who a happy birthday.


[BBC]

A happy day. And it seems like only yesterday that we were mourning the loss of Clara.

Wednesday, November 18, 2015

MST3K Question of the Day: Updating the Classic

We all know that Mystery Science Theater 3000 will be returning soon. And, if you're like me, you'd just be happy with more of the same. That is, a guy in space being shown bad movies and him watching them with his two robot friends while making fun of the movie.

Simple. Well, sort of. Except for all of the shooting the janitor into space and him building robots and ... okay, it's not simple. But, it's just a show, you should really just relax.

Remembering, though, that the show was canceled back in the day -- twice, in fact -- we want the show to stick around for a while. As long as it's funny, at least.

But, you know kids these days. Things can't be like they used to be. We have to update things to get the kids' attention. And, TV is no different.

Which brings us to our MST3K Question of the Day: What changes to MST3K are needed to make it appealing to today's TV viewer?

Tuesday, November 17, 2015

MST3K Question of the Day: The Movies

By now, you're not only excited about the MST3K reboot, you're actually sick of hearing about it. Well, think about what poor Joel and Mike had to go through. Now, you don't feel so bad, do you?

And now that I've cleverly maneuvered you into being in a good mood, let's put that to some good use.

We know there will be some changes in the reboot of Mystery Science Theater 3000, but some things will remain pretty much the same. For example, there will have to be a bad movie to riff. Or, like they did from time to time, a TV show presented as a movie.

Which brings us to our MST3K Question of the Day: What should be the first movie/TV show riffed on the new MST3K?

You're smart enough, you're good enough, and doggone it, people like your answers. Share with us, won't you?

Monday, November 16, 2015

MST3K Question of the Day: The Villains

With the reboot of MST3K coming soon, we are all so excited that we don't know what to do. Well, I'm excited. You should be too. But, it's okay if you're not. I'm excited enough for all of us.

Anyway, there will be some changes in the show with the reboot. There will be a new host, for one. And, there will be a new villain.

We had Dr. Forrester and Dr. Erhardt, then Dr. Forrester and TV's Frank, then Dr. Forrester and his mother Pearl, then Pearl with Professor Bobo and Observer. But, the new show will feature a new villain, but we don't know who just yet. And that's where you can help.

Today's Mystery Science Theater 3000 Questions of the Day: Who should be the new villain for the show?

Give us your best suggestion. We don't want guesses, we want ideas. And, where else but the twisted brains of the world's largest supply of Moon Nukers than the comments section of IMAO. I turn it over to you now.

Friday, November 13, 2015

MST3K: The Reboot

Have you heard the news? In the not too distant future, next Sunday A.D., Mystery Science Theater 3000 will be returning! But, of course, the whole story is complicated.

Shout Factory has purchased Mystery Science Theater 3000 and has licensed Joel Hodgson to restart the show. Joel has launched a Kickstarter campaign to do just that.

There will be new on-screen talent. Joel won't be the host, there will be a new villain, and new actors will portray Crow and Servo. None of the RiffTrax crew (Mike Nelson, Kevin Murphy, Bill Corbett, who played Mike, Servo, and Crow in the later years) will be involved.

Confused? Just be thankful I didn't give you the whole story about all the cast changes and network changes over the years. I could, you know. I'm that obnoxious. But I spared you of that. I'm that nice. You're welcome.

Anyway, MST3K is coming back! Yay!

Which brings up the Question of the Day. Who should be the new host?

If you want to be a killjoy and be serious about it, go ahead. Or, you could play comedian and come up with a really clever idea that will make everyone else just laugh and laugh. Go for that.

Again, who would be your choice for the new host for the reboot of Mystery Science Theater 3000?

Tuesday, November 10, 2015

USMC 240th


On November 10, 1775, the Continental Congress approved the resolution to establish two battalions of Marines able to fight for independence at sea and on shore. This date marks the official formation of the Continental Marines."
Major Samuel Nicholas, 1st Commandant (1775-1783)
In the 240 years since the formation of the Marines, those Americans who wore the uniform and served our country have made us proud.

We are proud of the opportunity to offer our thanks and best wishes on this anniversary date. Civilians, soldiers, airmen, sailors, and indeed all Americans are proud of our Marines.

Monday, November 9, 2015

Doctor Who fans, you knew I'd mention this...

>Okay, Doctor Who fans, you knew I'd mention this. The accompanying image is where The Doctor told Osgood, "Basil."

Now, if you're not a fan of the show, you won't care. If you're a fan, but haven't seen the episode that aired this past weekend, well, *SPOILERS*

Kinda.

If you saw the episode, you saw that The Doctor told Osgood that his first name was "Basil."

(Oh, and shameless plug for Larynn's review of the episode over at Doctor Who LaB.)

Now, who among you were actually surprised when The Doctor said his name was Basil? Did you really think he would say "Frank" or "Harvey" or "Sarah" or "Mr. Right" or "Spacemonkey" or "Lactose the Intolerant" or "Keln." Not that those aren't good names. They're perfectly fine names. But, for The Doctor, does any name fit more than Basil? Okay, maybe Spacemonkey. But, really, when you think Doctor Who don't you really think "Basil?"

Of course you do. And so does Steven Moffat and Peter Capaldi and everyone else who works on the show or watches the show.

I'm unsure whether to say "thank you" or "you're welcome." Either will do.

Saturday, October 31, 2015

It was 40 years ago today...

Queen's Bohemian Rhapsody was released 40 years ago today. I was a DJ at a small radio station in a small town in southeast Georgia. When the record came in, I listened to it. Queen wasn't new. They had been around a few years, and had played some of their stuff. But, when I listened to Bohemian Rhapsody I thought "What the heck?..." Or something along that line. But, it wasn't my call about adding it to the rotation. When it started making its way up the national charts, it was added to our rotation.

The general reaction was "What the heck?..." Or something along that line. Still, it kinda grew on everyone. After all, this was the mid 1970s.

If you like the song, you'll like this old video, because it's a funny tribute. If you hate the song, you'll like this video, because, well... muppets.


[The YouTube]

Okay, if you'd rather watch the original version, click here.

Thursday, October 29, 2015

The Force Awakens Trailer featuring Luke Skywalker

I keep reading that Star Wars fans are getting their panties in a wad over Luke Skywalker not being in any of the trailers for The Force Awakens. Well, a whole bunch of somebodies have not been paying attention. Because, right there on The YouTube is a trailer, and I sure enough spotted Luke in it. You gotta look careful, though.


[The YouTube]

Maybe I will go see the movie after all. The current season of Doctor Who will be over by then, anyway.

Wednesday, October 28, 2015

The Force Awakens or Batman v Superman

So, which are you most excited about? The Force Awakens or Batman v Superman? Well, why not both?

Here's the trailer for Batman v Superman with the audio for The Force Awakens


[The YouTube]

Me? I don't know. Might see them both. Might see neither one. Might wait for them to come to home video and just watch them on the big screen color TV. For now, I'm going to keep watching stuff on the small screen like Doctor Who.

Which reminds me. Check out the Doctor Who LaB podcast at http://DoctorWhoLaB.com where romance author Larynn Ford and I review both new and classic episodes. You can subscribe to it on iTunes and listen to it while waiting in line to watch The Force Awakens. Or Batman v Superman. Or both.

Wednesday, October 21, 2015

The Future is Now

Embedding the video is hit and miss. Oh, well. Click it, watch it, come back here and comment.

Back To The Future Vs. Reality

Hey future, why are we still tying our own shoes?

Posted by HuffPost Australia on Thursday, October 15, 2015

[From The Facebook]

Neither future is how I imagined today would be. But how did you imagine it would be?

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

Coming soon to a DVD near you. But not me.

One of the biggest money-making films of all time is out on DVD and Blu-Ray today. And I was wondering if I wanted to get it.

Jurassic World hits stores -- and Amazon Instant Video -- today. I haven't seen the film. Apparently, from the box office numbers, I'm one of about a dozen people who haven't seen it. So, before I shell out $20 for it, I wanted to find out if it's any good. There's a trailer out. An Honest one.


[The YouTube]

Still not sure they're going to get my money. I could own Jurassic World or get four KFC Lunch Meals. I'm leaning toward the Colonel.

Monday, October 19, 2015

It's no Bohemian Rhapsody, but...

A small clip of the Swedish Chef performing "Rapper's Delight." Yes, you read that right.


[The YouTube]

You're welcome.

 

I know. You thought I was going to somehow find a way to plug the latest episode of Doctor Who LaB podcast, didn't you? Well, there's no connection. So I won't.

Friday, October 16, 2015

Relax!!!

You've nearly made it through the work week. Perhaps this will help you finish the week. Perhaps not.


[The YouTube]

If you're in the mood for more Doctor Who, there's the Doctor Who LaB podcast that I keep nagging you about. Larynn and I have a new episode up. We talk about a really really old serial from the early days of the show: An Unearthly Child (conclusion, episodes 2, 3, & 4). Find out why the TARDIS looks like it does, and learn how time travel can be like playing with fire.

Tuesday, October 13, 2015

Navy

240 years ago today, the Second Continental Congress passed a resolution, establishing what is today, the United States Navy:
"Resolved, That a swift sailing vessel, to carry ten carriage guns, and a proportionable number of swivels, with eighty men, be fitted, with all possible despatch, for a cruise of three months, and that the commander be instructed to cruize eastward, for intercepting such transports as may be laden with warlike stores and other supplies for our enemies, and for such other purposes as the Congress shall direct.

That a Committee of three be appointed to prepare an estimate of the expence, and lay the same before the Congress, and to contract with proper persons to fit out the vessel.

Resolved, that another vessel be fitted out for the same purposes, and that the said committee report their opinion of a proper vessel, and also an estimate of the expence."

Happy birthday, Navy.

We have some old Navy personnel around the blogosphere. (Thinking of you, Harvey.) And, I've got a next door neighbor that flies the Navy flag every day, just under his U.S. flag.

Do me a favor, will you? Go find a sailor and buy him lunch. Or a drink. Or shake his hand and thank him for his service.

Monday, October 12, 2015

One more self-serving plug

Yes, one more self-serving plug for the Doctor Who LaB podcast. Got its own domain name now: http://doctorwholab.com

If you have any feedback, good or bad, let us know. It all helps.

Thursday, October 8, 2015

Questions for Doctor Who LaB?

A quick note about Doctor Who LaB podcast. Larynn and I have received feedback indicating some might have questions about Doctor Who. We certainly don't claim to be experts. (Well, maybe we do, but we'll never admit that.) But, we'd love to hear any feedback, and if we can answer any questions, we will. Or make something up if we don't know the answer. Kinda like everything else, to be truthful about it.

If you have questions or other feedback for Doctor Who LaB, you can leave that here.

Although the show airs on BBC America on Saturday nights, we don't actually do our watching of the show and recording of the podcast until Sunday afternoon. That means that if you have any thoughts on the episode we're going to be discussing, we'll be able to include that, too.

You know what? If you want to send us an audio comment, we'll play along. Record it and email it (.mp3 preferred) to Doctor Who Lab, and we'll include it. Probably.

Link: Doctor Who LaB | Doctor Who LaB Feedback

Tuesday, October 6, 2015

Geek alert: Doctor Who LaB

I'm going to briefly hijack the Website to promote a little project I'm currently involved with. Or, with which I'm currently involved. Whichever is gooder English.

It's a podcast called "Doctor Who LaB" and, yes, that capitalization is correct. (Maybe you'll figure out why by the time you're done reading this post.)

As you may know, I spent some time watching Doctor Who from the beginning. As in, from 1963 to the present. Sure, you remember.

Anyway, after that, I introduced Larynn Ford (an author in my local area) to Doctor Who. She was intrigued enough with the show after meeting Colin Baker last year at DragonCon that she decided she wanted to watch it. But, she started with Christopher Eccleston, and watched all the shows up to the new season. (She still hasn't seen any Colin Baker episodes.) She liked the show a lot, so we decided to start a podcast. Which is just what the world needs: another Doctor Who podcast.

What do we have to offer that's different? Well, we plan to watch all the episodes and talk about them. All the episodes. All 800+ episodes. Every last one of 'em.

But, about us, well, there's a classic Who fan (me) and a New Who fan (her). She's a romance author, and I'm a computer geek. She likes Country and I like Classic Rock. I'm from Georgia and she's from Alabama. Okay, that last one isn't much of a contrast. (Unless you are actually from either Georgia or Alabama, then it's like night and day.)

Anyway, we have two different perspectives looking at the same thing. Maybe it'll work, maybe it won't. If you want to hear this train wreck, you can find them at LarynnFord.com. It's also on iTunes (links are at LarynnFord.com).

Now, back to teh funneh.

Friday, September 11, 2015

1776 ft

One World Trade Center

11:00 AM

10:30 AM


10:28 AM


10:07 AM


9:59 AM


9:41 AM


9:37 AM

9:03 AM

8:46 AM

8:00 AM

7:00 AM

Wednesday, July 15, 2015

Twilight Zone Trivia

One of these is not like the others. Only a true Twilight Zone fan will know which. I knew right from the start. But, do you?


[The YouTube]

By the way, if you have to guess, you'll probably not get it right. But, if you know, you know. I'll give you until tonight.

Okay, if you want a hint (another one; yes, you already have one), it happened on the show three times, but only once in this video. That ought to be a useless enough hint.

UPDATE: The answer is in the comments.

Saturday, July 4, 2015

Independence Day 2015

IN CONGRESS, July 4, 1776.

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united States of America,

When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all men are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness.--That to secure these rights, Governments are instituted among Men, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed, --That whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect their Safety and Happiness. Prudence, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while evils are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the forms to which they are accustomed. But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security.--Such has been the patient sufferance of these Colonies; and such is now the necessity which constrains them to alter their former Systems of Government. The history of the present King of Great Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these States. To prove this, let Facts be submitted to a candid world.
  • He has refused his Assent to Laws, the most wholesome and necessary for the public good.
  • He has forbidden his Governors to pass Laws of immediate and pressing importance, unless suspended in their operation till his Assent should be obtained; and when so suspended, he has utterly neglected to attend to them.
  • He has refused to pass other Laws for the accommodation of large districts of people, unless those people would relinquish the right of Representation in the Legislature, a right inestimable to them and formidable to tyrants only.
  • He has called together legislative bodies at places unusual, uncomfortable, and distant from the depository of their public Records, for the sole purpose of fatiguing them into compliance with his measures.
  • He has dissolved Representative Houses repeatedly, for opposing with manly firmness his invasions on the rights of the people.
  • He has refused for a long time, after such dissolutions, to cause others to be elected; whereby the Legislative powers, incapable of Annihilation, have returned to the People at large for their exercise; the State remaining in the mean time exposed to all the dangers of invasion from without, and convulsions within.
  • He has endeavoured to prevent the population of these States; for that purpose obstructing the Laws for Naturalization of Foreigners; refusing to pass others to encourage their migrations hither, and raising the conditions of new Appropriations of Lands.
  • He has obstructed the Administration of Justice, by refusing his Assent to Laws for establishing Judiciary powers.
  • He has made Judges dependent on his Will alone, for the tenure of their offices, and the amount and payment of their salaries.
  • He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.
  • He has kept among us, in times of peace, Standing Armies without the Consent of our legislatures.
  • He has affected to render the Military independent of and superior to the Civil power.
  • He has combined with others to subject us to a jurisdiction foreign to our constitution, and unacknowledged by our laws; giving his Assent to their Acts of pretended Legislation:
    • For Quartering large bodies of armed troops among us:
    • For protecting them, by a mock Trial, from punishment for any Murders which they should commit on the Inhabitants of these States:
    • For cutting off our Trade with all parts of the world:
    • For imposing Taxes on us without our Consent:
    • For depriving us in many cases, of the benefits of Trial by Jury:
    • For transporting us beyond Seas to be tried for pretended offences
    • For abolishing the free System of English Laws in a neighbouring Province, establishing therein an Arbitrary government, and enlarging its Boundaries so as to render it at once an example and fit instrument for introducing the same absolute rule into these Colonies:
    • For taking away our Charters, abolishing our most valuable Laws, and altering fundamentally the Forms of our Governments:
    • For suspending our own Legislatures, and declaring themselves invested with power to legislate for us in all cases whatsoever.

  • He has abdicated Government here, by declaring us out of his Protection and waging War against us.
  • He has plundered our seas, ravaged our Coasts, burnt our towns, and destroyed the lives of our people.
  • He is at this time transporting large Armies of foreign Mercenaries to compleat the works of death, desolation and tyranny, already begun with circumstances of Cruelty & perfidy scarcely paralleled in the most barbarous ages, and totally unworthy the Head of a civilized nation.
  • He has constrained our fellow Citizens taken Captive on the high Seas to bear Arms against their Country, to become the executioners of their friends and Brethren, or to fall themselves by their Hands.
  • He has excited domestic insurrections amongst us, and has endeavoured to bring on the inhabitants of our frontiers, the merciless Indian Savages, whose known rule of warfare, is an undistinguished destruction of all ages, sexes and conditions.

In every stage of these Oppressions We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble terms: Our repeated Petitions have been answered only by repeated injury. A Prince whose character is thus marked by every act which may define a Tyrant, is unfit to be the ruler of a free people.

Nor have We been wanting in attentions to our Brittish brethren. We have warned them from time to time of attempts by their legislature to extend an unwarrantable jurisdiction over us. We have reminded them of the circumstances of our emigration and settlement here. We have appealed to their native justice and magnanimity, and we have conjured them by the ties of our common kindred to disavow these usurpations, which, would inevitably interrupt our connections and correspondence. They too have been deaf to the voice of justice and of consanguinity. We must, therefore, acquiesce in the necessity, which denounces our Separation, and hold them, as we hold the rest of mankind, Enemies in War, in Peace Friends.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united States of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Judge of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good People of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare, That these United Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent States; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Great Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent States, they have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.

Saturday, June 6, 2015

31

I'm not a fan of horse racing. Or any kind of racing, actually. Still, sometimes, you see something and are amazed. And, that amazement stays with you.

This afternoon, there's a misspelled horse named American Pharoah that is trying to become the first Triple Crown winner in 37 years. And, if he wins, good for him. And some of you young kids might remember it years down the road. But, it'll be hard to beat the memories caused by a three-year old named Secretariat back in 1973.

Secretariat won the Kentucky Derby, the first race in the Triple Crown with a record time of 1:59.4. How fast was that record? Well, it's still the fastest Kentucky Derby ever. The second fastest Kentucky Derby time? Same race. Sham came in second at 1:59.9 which is faster than the second-fastest winning time of 1:59.97 by Monarchos in 2001. (I just won you a bar bet. You're welcome.)

In the Preakness Stakes, there was a problem with the clock. There's no doubt that Secretariat won the race by 2½ lengths over Sham, but a problem with the clock threw a question over the time. The previous record (since the race lengthened to 1 3⁄16 miles in 1925) of 1:54 was set two years earlier by Canonero II. Secretariat's time was given as 1:55, but that was immediately disputed. CBS entered the argument by showing tapes of both the 1971 race and the 1973 race in a split-screen, and proved that Secretariat beat Canonero II handily. It took a while, but the official time is now 1:53, and that record still stands. (Sham's time would work out to 1:53.4, the second-fastest Preakness, if you want to win another bar bet.)

The clincher in how great a horse Secretariat was had to be the Belmont Stakes. That race was lengthened to 1½ miles in 1926. And the record set in 1973 still stands. But, it wasn't just the time of 2:24 that's amazing. It's how that horse won it.

If you weren't around in 1973 to see it on TV, thanks to the magic of the internets, here's your chance.


[The YouTube]

The actual margin of victory was 31 lengths. How far is that? Well, more than you can put in a camera at a horse race in 1973. Think about it like this. You and a buddy find a football field. You stand on the goal line. Now, have your buddy walk out to the 17 yard line. No, the other 17 yard line. Cross mid-field and keep walking. That 17 yard line. Got it? That's right about 31 lengths.

I don't know anything about horse racing. But I know I saw something special that day. Maybe there'll be another Triple Crown winner this afternoon. Maybe not. But, there may never be another Secretariat.

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Long enough

When it's Sunday (and it is) and you're in a small town in southeast Georgia (and I am) and your router goes out (and it did), you don't have a lot of options. In fact, the only real option is Walmart.

I really don't want to complain about Walmart. I mean, they did have a good quality router in stock, and the price was pretty good. And, on it's worst day, traffic at a small town Walmart is better than traffic at a large city, well, anything.

So, I got up to the register with my new router, and the cashier was prompted to ask me about an extended warranty. I was a little surprised. I picked up the box again, looked at it to make sure, and told her, "It comes with a lifetime warranty."

"This is extra," she offered.

"No, thanks," I replied. "Lifetime will be long enough."

I hope I don't end up regretting my decision.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Obamacare


[Politifake]

About a boat

Up front, I want to say that I don't have a boat. I've never had a boat. And I don't intend to ever have a boat. I'm not a boat guy. But a lot of people are. Maybe you are. If you are, maybe you'll want to play along. And, even if you aren't, maybe you'll want to play along, too. Because fun is fun.

Some people are kinda clever when it comes to naming a boat. And, since it was a Saturday, and I didn't feel like getting out of the recliner, I pulled up The Facebook and started seeing what kinda nonsense people I know or are friends with and have never met are getting themselves into. And that's how I ran across a list of 37 interesting boat names. And, since it was The Facebook, there were only 25 on the list I clicked through to. If math and spelling were a requirement, there would be no one on The Facebook.

Anyway, some of the boat names were kinda clever.
  • Bacon in the Sun
  • Ships & Giggles
  • Dijabringabeeralong
  • Master Baiter
  • Fish & Chicks
Okay, some were kinda lame. But some were funny. But I think y'all can do better.

If you've had a fun or funny name on a boat, how about sharing it with us. Or, if you have an idea for a great boat name, share that. Could be fun.

What, indeed.


[The Political Insider - The Facebook]

Friday, April 10, 2015

What I found out about this was shocking

Jonathan Banks, as fans of Breaking Bad or Better Call Saul know, plays the character Mike Ehrmantraut on those shows. He was appearing on Keith Olbermann's show and said that Washington Redskins owner Dan Syder should change the team's name because some people are offended. He went on to say that Snyder could make a lot of money on sales of new merchandise with a new nickname and logo.
"They will make a fortune [if they change the name]. And what is this guy? … He is Jewish, right — Snyder?"
When I read this report, I have to admit I was shocked.

I mean, did you know Keith Olbermann was still on TV?

Now THIS is something someone should actually do


[The Comical Conservative - The Facebook]

Sunday, April 5, 2015

Easter Sunday 2015

Luke 24: 1-9
  1. Now upon the first day of the week, very early in the morning, they came unto the sepulchre, bringing the spices which they had prepared, and certain others with them.
  2. And they found the stone rolled away from the sepulchre.
  3. And they entered in, and found not the body of the Lord Jesus.
  4. And it came to pass, as they were much perplexed thereabout, behold, two men stood by them in shining garments:
  5. And as they were afraid, and bowed down their faces to the earth, they said unto them, Why seek ye the living among the dead?
  6. He is not here, but is risen: remember how he spake unto you when he was yet in Galilee,
  7. Saying, The Son of man must be delivered into the hands of sinful men, and be crucified, and the third day rise again.
  8. And they remembered his words,
  9. And returned from the sepulchre, and told all these things unto the eleven, and to all the rest.

Monday, February 16, 2015

Washington's Birthday (2015)

George Washington

Every year, I do this. And, since 2015 is a year, I'll do it this year. And today is the day. You know what today is, right?

If you said "Presidents Day," you need to be beat with a stick. With knots in it so it hurts really bad. And, if the stick breaks, another stick needs to be used. Until we're all out of sticks. Because you should know by now that it's not "Presidents Day."

Today is Washington's Birthday.

Now, I know, George Washington's birthday is actually February 22nd. That's not until Sunday. But, there is a federal holiday called Washington's Birthday, and it's to honor George Washington. And the name of that holiday is ... Washington's Birthday.

So, why does everybody call it Presidents Day? Well, not everybody does. I don't. And, I hope, you don't either. But there are a lot of folks running around loose that call it Presidents Day. But that doesn't make it Presidents Day. It's still Washington's Birthday.

This day is set aside to honor the first President of the United States, George Washington. He was instrumental in the founding of this nation, and if anyone deserves a holiday, it's him.

Washington's Birthday was the fifth national holiday established, after New Year's Day, Independence Day, Thanksgiving Day, and Christmas Day. It was one of the holidays picked for a Monday observance in 1971 when they started screwing around with federal holidays, and making some fall on a Monday. Along with Washington's Birthday, the holidays Memorial Day, Labor Day, and Columbus Day were also moved to Mondays. The first four holidays and Veterans Day kept their regular days.

If you want one of "those people" that are always correcting others for things ... you know, like I'm doing right now ... and you want a link to throw at people, use this link to United States Code 5 U.S.C. 6103.

Why am I like this about Washington's Birthday? That's the wrong question. The right question is: why aren't you?

George Washington has his own day. And Americans need to recognize that. It's not often the government gets stuff right. This is one of those rare times. Don't let regular folks screw that up.

Tuesday, January 13, 2015

Magazine covers calculated to drive you MAD

This isn't a real MAD magazine cover. And that's part of the joke. Mort Todd is the former editor of Cracked, and as part of support for the Charlie Hebdo magazine, he zinged both the Moslem terrorists and the wimpy American media.

While MAD magazine does offer some good, biting satire from time to time, this MAD cover isn't one of them. Perhaps MAD will step up. In the meantime, I'm sure they can appreciate this from a competitor.




[Red State, via Don Surber]