Thursday, February 21, 2013

To Mars!

Dennis Tito wants to go to Mars. In fact, he says he's blasting off to head to the Red Planet in January, 2018. Look at a calendar; that's less than five years from now.

I know what you're thinking: Who the heck is Dennis Tito? Well, he's the guy that, in 2001, paid the Russians a bunch of money to take him to the space station. He's the first private citizen to go to space. Now, he wants to go to Mars.

I kinda got my doubts about the feasibility of a trip to Mars, at least right now. But, hey, it's his money; he can do what he wants with it.

But just wait until the liberals find out what an investment consultant is planning. They'll throw a hissy fit. Someone like Dennis Tito wasting all that money on a trip to Mars when the government could waste that money right here on Earth.

I'm kinda with the liberals on this one. Kinda. Let me explain.

I think the first person to Mars should be Barack Obama. I mean, he's as well-qualified to be an astronaut -- or would he be a cosmonaut? -- as he was to be elected president. Or to win the Nobel Peace Prize. Or... well, anything he's done. His lack of qualifications haven't stopped him from being all these other things, so why should they stop him from being the first man to Mars?

And, we shouldn't wait, either. Send him now. Tomorrow. Heck, send him today.

Sure, there are some problems with the physics involved, since the positions of Earth and Mars right now make the trip a little difficult. But, if they simply put a "Physics-Free Zone" sign on the rocket, he'll get there and back in around 500 days. Maybe even less.

There's also the problem of oxygen. Obama would need oxygen. A lot of oxygen if he talks a lot. But, as wonderful and magical as he is -- giving us free phones and food stamps and such -- I bet when he breaths out, it's not carbon dioxide, but even more oxygen. So, that problem is solved.

Of course, there's the issue with food. [See previous paragraph and apply to this topic because I don't really want to write about that.]

Anyway, I say we send Obama to Mars.

Except...

There's the whole problem with space radiation exposure during such a long trip. What if the 1950s movies were right, and it caused Obama to grow to incredible size when he gets back to Earth? He'd go crazy and destroy everything.

Of course, he's kinda doing that now, but at least we'd get a 500-day reprieve. So, let the countdown begin!

Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Practice


[Source: Mike Lester - GoComics]

Heat map

Have you seen the new meteor impact heat map?

Well, there's a map that plots all of the recorded meteorite impacts on Earth since 2300 BC. Note, this is recorded impacts. If no one saw it or found evidence of it, it's not recorded. That's why there aren't a whole lot shown over the oceans. So, it's not a full mapping of every meteor impact, just those we know about.



You can go to the interactive map and zoom in or select any place on earth. It contains information about each strike. I found it interesting.

Naturally, it's inspired by the recent meteor strike in Russia. But, it's not the only map inspired by recent events.

Here's a map of areas of the United States that are victims of the economic impact of Obama and Democrat policies. Those adversely affected are shown in purple.



It's a little more accurate than the meteor map. And a lot more scary.

Monday, February 18, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Relief?


[Source: Steve Kelley - GoComics]

Washington's Birthday (2013)

It seems nobody wants George Washington to have a birthday anymore. Or ever.

George Washington was born on February 11, 1731. At least, as they used the calendar at the time. Great Britain and its colonies used the Julian calendar then, and the new year didn't begin until March 25. Weird, right?

Then, in 1752, Great Britain adopted the Gregorian calendar. That moved New Year's Day to January 1, in addition to causing a refiguring of dates. Among the changes was that February 11, 1731 became February 22, 1732.

Only, folks weren't done messing with George Washington's birthday. You see, 1879, the United States added Washington's Birthday as its fifth national holiday, joining New Year's Day, Independence Day, Thanksgiving Day, and Christmas Day. Other days were added along and along.

In the late 1960s, there came a movement to make federal holidays fall on a Monday. In 1971, that was made to happen for four of the nine federal holidays. New Year's Day, Independence Day, Veterans Day, Thanksgiving Day, and Christmas Day kept their actual dates. But Washington's Birthday, Memorial Day, Labor Day, and Columbus Day were moved to Mondays. When Birthday of Martin Luther King, Jr. was added -- and yes, that's the actual name of the holiday -- it, too, was designated as a Monday.

All of the Monday holidays fall on the Monday nearest the actual date, except one: Washington's Birthday. It's the third Monday of February, which means it can fall as early as the 15th, but never after the 21st. In other words, Washington's Birthday will never fall on Washington's birthday.

But wait! There's more!

In the last several years, there has been a diminishing of George Washington by people calling his birthday "Presidents Day." Well, it's not. Now, it's true that some states used to celebrate Lincoln's birthday (February 12) as a state holiday, and have combined Lincoln's birthday and Washington's birthday into one observance. But, that's only for some states. The U. S. holiday on the third Monday in February is Washington's Birthday. Take a look at United States Code 5 U.S.C. 6103 and see for yourself.

It's been rough for George Washington's birthday, officially and unofficially.

First, they move his birthday from February 11 in one year to February 22 in another year. Then, they make it on a Monday that will never match the actual date. Then, they call it something else. Do some people hate George Washington? Maybe so, After all, he did help secure the blessings of liberty and help found these United States.

I think he deserves his birthday to be called by its proper name. If you hear anyone call it "Presidents Day," you have my permission to beat them around the head with a stick. Two, if you think they really need it.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Caduceus


[Source: Michael Ramirez - GoComics]

Of course, what else could be expected to arise from the snake oil salesman that currently infests the Oval Office?

The importance of being Earnest. And Pam.

A group of six Georgia legislators have proposed a bill in the State House that would make certain fake images illegal. Like when you take the head of one person and put it on, say, a porn star? That would be a crime under the bill.

The actual wording of House Bill 39 says:
... a person commits defamation when he or she causes an unknowing person wrongfully to be identified as the person in an obscene depiction ...
The bill goes on to describe what "nudity," "obscene depiction," and "sexual conduct" means, in case you didn't know. It also describes all the fun/naughty parts that make nudity, obscene, and sexual actually nudity, obscene, and sexual.

The six Democrats -- you knew the sponsors were all Democrats, right? -- really don't like that kind of humor. Two of them were victims of such prankery, Pam Dickerson* (who introduced a similar bill last year) and Earnest Smith*. The blog Georgia Politics Unfiltered is one of the culprits that prompted such actions. You can search that site for more images, if you want. You don't want. Trust me.

Still, I understand that those that are victims of such actions might not like it. But, a crime? Such thin skin.

Maybe I'd feel differently if I was the victim of such actions. And, no, this is NOT a call to photoshop some image of my head on a porn star's body.

Unless it was Jenna Jameson. I've always wanted to be Jenna Jameson.

Wednesday, February 13, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Manhunt


[Source: Lisa Benson - GoComics]

While the left cheers on gun-toting cop-killer Christopher Dorner, they criticize legal gun owners for legally owning guns.

If you don't understand the left's logic, I can explain it to you. They're idiots. Some people call them dumbasses, which is probably a better term. Some call them useful idiots. Those that call them that are the ones using them to their own ends.

I gave up trying to figure them out a long time ago. I accept the fact that they have a severe case of the dumbass and I accept that there's a good chance they won't recover from it.

In the meantime, those using those useful idiots are trying to take away our rights. We're the ones under the gun, while criminal elements are running free. And some of them are running free in positions of power.

Pluto's moons

Photo: NASA
Folks need help naming Pluto's moons.

Actually, they don't any help at all. Scientists and astronomers and such have had no problem naming planets, moons, or other celestial objects before, and they really don't have any trouble now. They want to pacify people who got all ticked off over the demotion of Pluto from planet to dwarf planet.

Or, maybe, they just want to get attention or something. Well, they got mine.

There's a Website that is set up for the purpose of naming two of Pluto's moons. Now, in case you didn't know, Pluto has five moons. Maybe it has more, but they only know about five. They discovered Charon in 1978. I remember that. At the time, they had no real idea just how big Pluto was. They figured it was probably about the size of Earth, though I was never really quite sure why. But, the discovery of Charon, and all the math that led to, came up with the idea that Pluto was a lot smaller than people thought.

Then, they discovered more moons in 2005. They named them Nix and Hydra. Then, they discovered two more, in 2011 and 2012, respectively. They haven't named them yet. And, according to the Laws of Science, Pluto can't bring the moons home from the hospital until they have a name. Or something.

So, the Website Pluto Rocks (get it?) has been set up to name the two moons. Currently, the frontrunners are Styx and Cerberus. Why a late '70s rock band would get a moon named after them is something I don't understand. Maybe Come Sail Away is a lot better song than I realized.

As for Cerebus, that's a dog. Which is kinda weird, since Pluto is Mickey Mouse's dog. Can a dog have a dog? I suppose if it's a three-headed dog, no one would complain. For long.

Anyway, most of the names on the ballot are names you'd expect, like Persephone, Hercules, Orpheus, and Barack.

Wait. Barack isn't on the list. But they do have a write-in ballot available. Maybe I'll write in a name. It damn sure won't be Barack. But, what should I write in? Or, what would you write in?

What should be the names of Pluto's moons?

Tuesday, February 12, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Drone


[Source: Michael Ramirez - Investors.com]

National Holiday?

Should today be a national holiday? It's the birthday of a famous American, but it's not officially celebrated.

When I was a child, we got a couple of days off school in February: the 12th and the 22nd. I don't know if it was like that everywhere, but it was in the part of southeast Georgia where I grew up.

Now, to be sure, the fact that February 12 is the anniversary of the founding of Georgia -- Georgia Day -- might have contributed to that. But, today, the state no longer celebrates the anniversary of its founding, as evident by the governor's official list of State Holidays for 2013.

But, there's still that birthday to consider.

Now, the American whose birthday it is, isn't that big of a hero in Georgia. Not historically, anyway. That doesn't mean that Georgia has been right in ignoring this American. But, I leave it to you: should states, or even the federal government, recognize today as a holiday in honor of this American?

Should we, as a nation, celebrate the birthday of Joe Don Baker?

Monday, February 11, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Problem Solved


[Source: Michael Ramirez - GoComics]

I really don't want to be one to pile on the Post Office. I know some people that work for the Post Office, and the ones I know are good people. And, at the Post Offices nearest where I work -- the one in downtown Columbus and the one just across the river in Phenix City -- the people there seem to be good folks. Of course, those have jobs where they deal with the public on a regular basis, so you'd think they'd be good at that kind of stuff. The ones I encounter are.

However, the people that I know well, that work the grunt positions behind the scenes, tell the story you'd expect. It's a government bureaucracy that fails to reward good work and fails to punish bad work. Everybody gets a participation trophy.

Now, these aren't people telling stories of how they, themselves, were passed over for promotion or recognition. Rather, they speak of others with whom they work that do great work, but are overlooked. They also speak of the stereotypical lazy government worker that others have to cover for, not to keep the other worker out of trouble, but so that Jane and John Public gets their mail.

I suppose they could let the job go undone, but they aren't that kind of person. They care about their job, and care that the customer get the best service possible.

Only, it's not always possible. Mail gets delivered late, workers work overtime, all because the system won't get rid of sorry people. Add that to the typical government mindset that the job doesn't matter as long as all the forms are filled out, and you have a very inefficient system.

I don't think what we have is what Benjamin Franklin envisioned.

Friday, February 8, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Trial


[Source: Dana Summers - GoComics]

Foiled again

There's an asteroid heading towards Earth. It's named 2012 DA14 -- it was named after its great-grandfather, I assume -- and discovered by Spanish astronomers about a year ago.

Oh, it's not going to hit the Earth. It'll come within 17,000 miles of the planet, but that's as close as it will get ... this time.

Those of you who were hoping for a killer asteroid to destroy the planet would've been disappointed anyway. Had it hit Earth, it would have created a blast roughly equal to the Tunguska event. Hardly a planet killer.

So, if you want to witness to destruction of civilization as we know it, you'll have to settle for watching Obama on the news.

Thursday, February 7, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Scouting


[Source: Chuck Asay - GoComics]

My buddy Paul Mitchell says:
Call me kooky, but if gay men want to teach knot tying and go camping with young boys, why don't they just advertise free camping trips for young boys? I am sure that most parents would be glad to let their boys go camping with gay men.
The Boy Scout Oath:
On my honor I will do my best to do my duty to God and my country and to obey the Scout Law; to help other people at all times; to keep myself physically strong, mentally awake, and morally straight.
Consider this post my effort to do a good turn daily.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Arms


[Source: Steve Kelley - GoComics]

Boob job

Image: GlobalPost
Word is that in North Korea, smaller is better. At least when it comes to breasts.

Seems that in the DPRK, large-breasted women are an object of shame. Or something. It's kinda hard to figure out. Here's how Google translates it:
One trillion sukhyang Mr. other North Korean women, "In the North, large breasts tightly tucked around. Big Tits in the North was a shame Korea is the belle of the conditions in the sludge was amazing, "he said.
Okay, that's kinda hard to figure out. Here's the same passage of the article, as translated by Bing:
Another hostage takers turned to North Korea's "premature, the chest is freakin' skimming. Big boobs in North Korea was a shameful condition of La Belle in Korea was fabulous, "he said.
You see why it's so hard to figure out.

Anyway, I think this phenomenon needs further study.

Volunteers?

Monday, February 4, 2013

Cartoon of the Day - Lost


[Source: Michael Ramirez - Investors.com]

In what is simply a coincidence, I've been re-watching episodes of Lost In Space recently.

I have a slight quibble about this particular cartoon. While Michael Ramirez usually hits the mark, in this case, he's slightly off. Obama shouldn't be Will Robinson. He's more Dr. Smith.

What do you think?