Messin' wit' french fried potaters

Mmmmgh. I wuz readin' th' newspaper th' oth'r day. Well, I wuz sorta readin' it. I know some o' th' words. Some o' them words I didn't know.


Anyways, it wuz sayin' that that Obamer lady has gone an' made some rest'rants stop sellin' french fried potaters. She ought not t' do that.


I likes french fried potaters. 'Course it's only rest'rants like yer Olive Garden and yer Red Lobster that's stoppin' th' french fried potaters. That's what th' Atlanta paper says, anyway.


It sez that th' kids can get french fried potaters if their momma or their daddy sez they can. I thought it wuz a joke when I heard about it. But it's not like any other joke I heard. Like the one about them two fellers standin' on th' bridge, goin' to th' bathroom. Mmmgh. That'n I got. Didn't get the joke about the food, though. So I'm thinkin' it's not a joke.


Besides, folks treat me like a kid sometimes, an' I'm thinkin' that th' waitress ladies won't let me get 'em without my momma or my daddy sayin' it's okay. My momma's dead. I kilt her. My daddy's still livin' but I don't cotton to him to much. So I'm on my own ever since I got out th' nervous hospital.


Anyways, if'n the Olive Lobster stores don't let me get french fried potaters, I'm like to get right upset about it. I don't think they'd care much for me if'n that happened.

You don't deserve your money!

Rep. Jan Schakowsky, D IL-9

I know. Some of you get up in the morning, dress, grab a quick bite or maybe a cup of coffee, and head to work.

Or, perhaps, you work odd hours. Sometimes long days.

Maybe you work a second job to help make ends meet.

I've done all of those things. Perhaps you have too, or still are.

But, whatever the circumstances, you work to earn your pay.

Only, you don't deserve it. Really. Check with Jan Schakowsky, the Democrat who represents Illinois' 9th district, who was speaking on WLS Radio:

I’ll put it this way. You don’t deserve to keep all of it and it’s not a question of deserving because what government is, is those things that we decide to do together.

Now, don't you feel ashamed of yourself? Thinking that the money you earned is yours. Or that you deserve it.

Thank goodness we have Democrats to set us straight.

Trade ya

According to AFP (Agence France-Presse, which is French or something for The Daily Planet, I think), Obama's approval rating is at 75%.

In Europe.

... he remains highly popular in Europe, with 75 percent in 12 EU nations approving his handling of global affairs, a poll said Wednesday.

He is also much better liked than his predecessor George W. Bush, whose rating in Europe was just 20 percent in 2008, said the Transatlantic Trends poll by the German Marshall Fund.

Here's what I think: if Europe like Barack Obama so much, they can have him.

But, we really should get something for him. I mean, he did kind of screw things up really bad here, so anything we can get would help offset the damage.

In baseball or pro football, trades happen all the time. In baseball, you hear about one player traded for another, or for a couple of minor leaguers. In pro football, some running back for a couple of draft choices happen from time to time. So why not in the oldest sport and second-oldest profession, politics?

Let's trade Obama to Europe. But who should we get in return?

I'm thinking Nicolas Sarkozy would be an improvement. With that trade, we'd get a hot First Lady, too!

Heck, the desiccated corpse of Charles de Gaulle would be an improvement over Obama.

How about the Queen of England? Sure, all she does is ride around waving funny at people, but right now, that sounds pretty good.

Or the Pope. He doesn't hate the Jews nearly as much as Obama does.

Maybe we could get Roman Polanski. Of course, he'd go straight to jail, but then we'd have a child rapist in jail and Obama in Europe. Win-win.

Or, perhaps instead of somebody from Europe, we could get a landmark or something. Like Stonehenge. Or the Rock of Gibraltar. Or Notre Dame de Paris. Or a pair of wooden shoes from the Netherlands. Any of these things would be an improvement over Obama.

So, what do you think? What would you like to get from Europe in exchange for Obama?

AttackWatch!!!

The Ministry of Truth Obama Administration has launched AttackWatch.com which will let you report people saying mean things about Big Brother the president.


[Direct link]

You can help. Go to AttackWatch.com and file a report.

Or, if you want, you can list things here. I'll start.

• I saw on the news that unemployment is up. I want to report the news.
• I was going to report the Communist Party, but they support Obama's tax hikes. So never mind about them.
• There was a dog in the neighborhood that was barking. It sounded like a mean bark. So he had to be a Teabaggerz dog. I want to report him.
• I started a movie on Netflix the other night when the president was on TV speaking, and the movie played instead of showing Obama. I want to report Netflix.

I'm sure there are plenty of other things you've seen that should be reported.

Fewer jobs for child molesters

With all the talk (and it's mostly talk) about Obama's Job Bill, it seems we're forgetting about the current jobs program that's underway: the TSA.

While the Transportation Security Administration was created under a law signed by President George W. Bush, it has really taken off with Obama's flunkies in charge.

I won't go into great detail why the TSA was a bad idea to begin -- does anyone really think anyone could have hijacked a planeload of Americans after 9/11? -- I will say that if it's possible to make a bad idea worse, a Democrat can do it. And a liberal Democrat can up the ante. And when you get moonbat crazy Democrats like Obama, Holder, and Napolitano overseeing things, you're going to find out what government overreach really is.

And they're reaching for your crotch. And boobies. And your kids.

Well, now, the TSA has decided it won't fondle your children. Not as much, anyway:

Children 12 years old and younger soon will no longer be required to remove their shoes at airport security checkpoints, Homeland Security Secretary Janet Napolitano told Congress on Tuesday. The policy also includes other ways to screen young children without resorting to a pat-down that involves touching private areas on the body.

Those heading into puberty are still up for groping.

What this means is the TSA won't be the prefect job for child molesters.

We're going to have to wait until they pass the Obama Jobs Bill to see what new opportunity child molesters will have.

9/11 timeline

[Direct link]

Also:

• History Channel timeline of events.
• Fox News stream of 9/11/2001

Who's gonna lose, week 2

If you came here looking for something humorous, you're out of luck. Frank J has teh funneh, but he's out of town for a few days.

If you came here looking for keen political insight, you're also out of luck. Because all you got is Obama speechifying and making the stock markets drop another 300+ points. So, nothing new there.

What else is there?

Well, if you checked that calendar you got as a gift last Christmas and thought, "Gosh, that's a lame Christmas gift," then you'll see that it's September ... and that calendars are actually pretty cool. Because they tell you when it's time for ... college football!

That's means it's time for another installment of "Who's Gonna Lose" ... which is sort of like Leonard's Losers, except Leonard's dead and most of you don't remember him. I'm certainly no Leonard Postosties, but I can pick a loser in college football. After all, I'm a fan of Georgia Bulldogs football and it's the 2011 season. How can you argue with credentials like that?