Kids and tragedy

My buddy Mad Max had some thoughts on kids and tragedy. He allowed me to share.

The only traumatic event of my young life was a drowning, a long time ago. A church outing, several days at very nice cabins by a beautiful lake, swimming and little rowboats. I was in a small boat with my Mom, her friend, and a few other kids. Older kids were cruising around in boats, paddling away, racing each other or just floating idly in the sun. It was some time after lunch, around 2 or 3pm. The Preacher had a meeting he had to attend, so he was gone at the time. My Dad had made a quick run to pick up some bait for fishing. There were others they left in charge, so its not like we were women and children abandoned.

A young fellow named Harold jumped out of his boat and began to swim toward ours. The theory of the adults is that there was a girl in our boat he was crazy about, that he wanted to impress her.

Halfway between his boat and ours, he stopped, and then went down. No one else seems to have seen it, but after the surface of the water smoothed, I clearly remember seeing bubbles burst and disturb that surface.

All others swiftly realized something was terribly wrong. Several of his friends dove in and went under, but came up with nothing. Mom and other adults were screaming at them to get back in their boats, terrified that more might go under and not come back. Some, including Mom's friend in my boat, were just screaming incoherently.

Because we were nearest where he went down, the few authority figures there were (older boys and the women, a couple guys on shore) designated my boat, with its screaming women and weeping girls and boys, to sit at the site until they could triangulate the position. All I wanted to do was get on land, but I had to sit in a chaotically panicked group and try to be patient.

After several nights of games and laughter in the large common room, that night was very eerie. Many of us just sat silently. Others quietly talked, particularly the older boys, shaken and unrightfully feeling guilty that they couldn't find him in time. Girls wept. Boys, too. Dad and the Preacher - you could see it in their eyes, they were wracked with guilt, both thinking they could have done something.

As it turned out, Harold got "the bends," a paralysis that locks up the muscles, and he sank like a rock - there was nothing anyone could have done. This was verified after they finally found him late the next day.

So, the point of all this? Here it is -

Any media truck coming down that trail that evening or the next morning would have been kicked so hard out of that area that they would never forget the experience. And us kids? We needed to talk with each other and our parents and our Preacher. We had absolutely no desire to make a name for ourselves by going on TV - the thought would not even have occurred to us.

Comic of the Day - News!

[Source: Michael Ramirez - Investors.com]

Cartoon of the day

[Source: Lisa Benson/GoComics]

Cartoon of the Day: Sit, Newt, Sit!

I thought this was funny.


[Direct link: Chuck Assay]

I used to work in Jacksonville. Them folks don't like other folks coming to town to tell them to sit down and shut up. If the crowd is actually people from Jacksonville, I expect they'll cheer, boo, or whatever, if they feel like it. If they are a bunch of transplants or college kids, they'll follow meekly along.

Florida isn't a southern state, except by accident of geography. Jacksonville, though, is a southern city. Or it was last time I was there.

So, are you going to watch the debate tonight?

Even the Twitterz knows

All that fancy technological computer stuff that the Twitterz uses knows that the media thinks just like Barack Obama.

Here's a screen capture from Obama's Twitter page:



See that down in the corner? Where it lists other Twitter users that are similar?



See? I don't see anyone from Fox News listed. Actually, I don't see anyone from CNN listed, either, which sort of surprised me.

When I did a refresh of the page, CBS News did come up. Did a lot more refreshes. George Stephanopoulos, some critter from NPR, and ... Twitter.



Which means that those of you who kept saying Twitter was teh ghey ... may have been right all along.

Replacing Ed Schultz

Thank you for coming in. Have a seat.


Danke, mein Herr!


Just sit down. Now, what was it you wanted to see me about, Hans?


Herr Griffin. I heard about the trouble that Eddie is in. I know he's currently only on suspension ... but everybody knows that an opening could occur.


...


Ah. I, um, just want you to keep me in mind if the opportunity arises.


Hans, while I appreciate your initiative, I really must say that ... well, I don't see anything in your resume that indicates any broadcast experience.


"Broadcast" ... "experience?"


Yes, here at MSNBC, we prefer to have experienced professionals on the air.


...


Okay, you got me! We'll put anybody on the air. But -- and understand that there is not currently an opening for Ed Shultz' position -- if we were to put another personality on the air, we want to make sure that person is a good fit.


Oh! I would be a perfect fit, Herr Griffin.


Well... let's see. What do you know about the economy.


I know nothing!


Mmm hmm. What about the legal system in this country?


Nothing! I know nothing!


Hmph. American history?


Absolutely nothing.


The legal system? Education?


Nothing! About everything I know nothing!


Where did work before? Your colleagues?


Ah. Well. I ran a toy factory before the war...


What about recently?


Well, it has been some time. But my last job was working with a bunch Nazis.


Hmmm. Actually, Hans, you do have an impressive resume. You would fit right in around here. If an opening comes up, I'll keep you in mind.

Just say "no" to crosshairs

CNN's John King (I think that's a real person, but I'm not sure) said this week that people shouldn't say "crosshairs":

My friend Andy Shaw used the term 'in the crosshairs' in talking about the candidates. We're trying, we're trying to get away from that language.

So, in case you didn't know, "crosshairs" is the new "n-word." Or maybe it's the new "c-word."

I'm assuming it's part of the whole "blame Palin" thing. I suppose it could be because of the "cross" part of the word, but I think it's part of the "blame Palin" thing. Maybe both.

But, I suppose that if now the media heads are getting all up in arms ... so to speak ... about the use of gun-related imagery and speech, then banning "crosshairs" is just the beginning. There are more things that you won't be able to say or do:

• Up in arms
• Shop at Target.
• Ride a bullet train.
• Visit Roy Rogers' horse.
• Change your printer cartridge.
• Read a magazine.
• Recoil in fear.
• Call someone a "slug."
• Score a safety in football.

I wonder what other things you won't be able to say or do as part of this narrative?

Update: More suggestions at IMAO.

Bad ideas for awards

Earlier this month, Wayne State University decided to stop awarding the "Helen Thomas Spirit of Diversity in the Media" award.

What does that mean? Well, it means that they actually gave a "Helen Thomas Spirit of Diversity in the Media" award. Which, to me, is a bigger story than stopping the giving of a "Helen Thomas Spirit of Diversity in the Media" award.

Earlier this year, she finally retired after catching flack for saying that Israelis should "get the hell out of Palestine" and "go home." To which Konzentrationslager, she didn't say.

Anyway, she recently defended her comments, then said the Jews were out to get her.

That was finally too much for Wayne State University, which had given the "Helen Thomas Spirit of Diversity in the Media" award.

What should they replace it with?

Well, how about something that makes just as much sense as a "Helen Thomas Spirit of Diversity in the Media" award? How about:

• Barack Obama Leadership Award
• Markos Moulitsas Humanitarian Award
• Julian Assange Safe Sex Award
• Keith Olbermann Journalism Award
• Al Gore Science Award

There must be plenty of examples of awards that some liberal institute of higher learning could give. Any other ideas?

I now pronounce you ...

Growing up in Georgia, I discovered that some words can be pronounced in different ways, depending on where you are.

For instance, "Jordan." You may say JOR-dan. Some people, in west Georgia and east Alabama pronounce it "JURD-n." Like that stadium where Auburn University plays football, Jordan-Hare. Or, Jimmy Carter's Chief of Staff, Hamilton Jordan. Those are pronounced "JURD-n."

Houston County, in central Georgia? It's not "HYOOS-ton," as you might think. It's "HOWS-ton." Really.

Buena Vista, in west Georgia? "BYOO-na VISS-ta." Seriously.

Walthourville, in southeast Georgia? "WALT-OWER-VILLE," like it's three words: Walt, hour, ville.

The lesson I learned, as I mentioned, is that words aren't always pronounced like you might think. Or like you've heard others pronounce.

In the public interest, I present a list of words that you may have been mispronouncing your whole life, along with the correct pronunciation.

• Democrat (COMM-yoo-nist)
• Republican (OWN-pro-BAY-shun)
• Pelosi (ASS)
• Reid (DUM-ass)
• Obama (FAYL-yur)
• Stimulus (BAD-i-DEE-uh)
• Palin (AWW-sum, alternate pronunciation HOT)
• NBC (DOOSH-bagz)
• CBS (DOOSH-bagz)
• CNN (DOOSH-bagz)
• ABC (NYN-tee-per-SENT-DOOSH-bagz)
• Fox News (TWIN-tee-per-SENT-DOOSH-bagz)
• Liberal (KRAP-for-BRAYNZ)
• Twitter (GAE)
• Facebook (GAE)
• Windows (per-PEH-chu-wul-BAY-tuh)

Perhaps you've run across other words that aren't pronounced as one would expect?

Sarah Palin can do it all

What can Sarah Palin do?

The better question is: What can Sarah Palin not do?

I discovered just how talented and versatile she is. She can quarterback Auburn University.

No, really. Look:

Source: Columbus Ledger-Enquirer

It surprised me, to say the least.

With her leading Auburn on the gridiron, I suspect she's completely lost all the Boise State and Texas Christian fans. All 20 of them.

Cartoon: Media and the Catholic Church

[Source: Chuck Asay]

Related: mean ol' meany: My Thoughts on the Media Attacks on the Catholic Church

Still not too late to evaluate Obama

CBS still has it's "Grade Obama's First Year in Office" poll up.

Harvey said that Obama "Probably Won’t Keep That Good Solid B+."

He's right. Just in case they take it down, here's the current tally.

The Economy

---

A:
4.27%

B:
4.35%

C:
5.22%

D:
17.79%

F:
68.38%

Foreign Policy

---

A:
6.29%

B:
4.01%

C:
7.71%

D:
21.79%

F:
60.21%

Health Care

---

A:
5.95%

B:
3.02%

C:
3.09%

D:
8.66%

F:
79.28%

Afghanistan

---

A:
5.38%

B:
14.21%

C:
26.85%

D:
22.57%

F:
30.99%

Iraq

---

A:
5.50%

B:
10.47%

C:
25.64%

D:
23.55%

F:
34.85%

Threat of Terrorism

---

A:
6.28%

B:
4.60%

C:
9.16%

D:
21.02%

F:
58.94%

Energy and the Environment

---

A:
5.31%

B:
5.13%

C:
12.26%

D:
20.85%

F:
56.45%

Social Issues

---

A:
6.19%

B:
4.67%

C:
11.49%

D:
19.48%

F:
58.18%

Bipartisanship

---

A:
6.25%

B:
3.02%

C:
4.09%

D:
8.58%

F:
78.06%

Obama's Overall Job as President

---

A:
5.69%

B:
3.99%

C:
3.87%

D:
22.98%

F:
63.47%

---

NOTE: This is not a scientific poll. The results above are for information purposes only, and should not be confused with the results of the scientific polls conducted by CBS News.

Go add your vote.

Oh, and if you are an Obama supporter, remember this is what the letter grades mean:

A - Awful
B - Bad
C - Crappy
D - Dreadful
F - fantastic