Saturday, November 17, 2007

How to be a dumbass III

I have been known to do stupid things.

Sometimes, it's because I thought something was funny, but it was just stupid.

Other times, it's because I just made a bone-headed decision.

And then, sometimes, it's because I wasn't thinking. Or thinking about something other than what I was doing.

That happened recently. Again.

I mentioned how busy I've been at work. Well, it's one of those things where, if things go right, I'm very busy. If things go wrong, I'm even busier.

Well, some things went wrong, and I had to go in early to resolve an issue. And by early, I mean earlier than the normal "get to work by 8:30" kind of early. Like, the phone ringing at 4-something, notifying me of a problem.

A quick troubleshooting process over the phone determined that the issue was an issue I needed to handle. And that meant coming in to work early. Like, right then.

So, a quick shower and I'm off to work.

I had my iPod with me, because it's nice to have some music to listen to while I'm working away by myself. And, I decided to listen to it on the ride into work. I have one of those things that allows it to play through the radio.

When I pulled into the parking garage, I found a spot near the door and backed into it. I like pulling forward out of the spaces, because some folks will run over you if you try to back out.

Anyway, after backing into the space, I put the earbuds into my ears, grabbed the iPod from the dock, put it into my pocket. Then I grabbed all my papers and stuff and got out of the car.

I had that nagging feeling that I had forgotten something.

Oh, well. I'd find out later.

Anyway, into work. And, after an hour, the issue was resolved to the point of things working like they were supposed to. Then, into the research into why things went wrong in the first place, so we could prevent it from happening again.

Around 6:30, I reached into my pocket and noticed my keys were missing.

Ah, so that's what I forgot.

I felt sure that I had locked the doors, so that would mean that I hadn't just left my keys in the car, I had locked the keys in the car.

Boy, what a dumbass, right?


So, what do do about it?

Well, the Wife would be leaving for work in about an hour. She was probably getting up about this time, and I figured I'd wait until she was ready and everything, then ask her to bring the spare keys. After I verified that I had indeed locked the keys in.

About that time, another person I worked with was there and we had to follow a troubleshooting path. It took a while.

Next thing I knew, it was a little after 9:00, and the Wife was already at work.

Oh, well. I'd call her at lunch and get her to run the keys down here.

As 11:30 approached -- early for lunch for us, except for me on this day, since my day began really early -- I called. No answer.

So, I headed out the door, figuring I'd walk down to where she worked, get the keys, and unlock the car.

As I passed the parking garage, I could see my car.

The headlights were on.

So, not only had I locked the keys in the car, I left the headlights on.

The good news was the lights were still on. That meant the battery wasn't dead. Yet.

I went into the parking garage instead, moving straight for the car.

I felt heat.

And heard a noise.

Yes, not only did I lock the keys in the car ... not only did I leave the headlights on ... I left the engine running.

For hours.

A look into the window showed that the car wasn't overheated. Yet. Temperature was up there, though.

Another call on the cell to the Wife. Still no answer.

So, I began walking that way.

Kept calling the whole time. Phone ringing. No answer.

Finally, after I entered the building and entering the elevator to head to her floor, she answered.

Got her to bring me the spare keys, then headed back out.

Waked back to work, to the parking garage, and finally go the keys out.

I've done some things before that show just how big a dumbass I can be.

This is way up there.


  1. There is a great scene in "Family Guy" where Peter locks his keys outside his car.

  2. Oh, my. I would have never in a million years have thought that you would have done that; it's so unlike you. You must have really been tired and distracted and overworked!

  3. Would you call that a "senior moment" or were you rocking to the iPod?! :) At least you didn't have to pay a locksmith to get them out of your trunk like I have!

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  5. Um... hahahaha!

    I mean, I'm laughing WITH you, right?

    Wow. Left the car actually running. That's just funny, right there! Thanks for sharing!

  6. Yeah, the car set there in the parking garage, running, for hours. Everyone who parked in the garage that morning had to walk past it.

    I have a personalized tag, and there's a parking permit, with number, on the car.

    Somebody could have reported it. But no one did.

    I guess they figured anyone stupid enough to leave his car running deserved what he got.

  7. I keep a set of spare keys in my pocket. I have used them many times.

  8. I am sending this to Bean. She does things like this all the time.


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