Saturday, May 15, 2010

Butt call

Wife's butt called me yesterday.

You know about butt-calls, right? That's where someone's actions unintentionally dial their cell phone. Often, it's because the phone is in a pants pocket, and the act of sitting down or moving in a certain way causes pressure on one or more keys, causing the speed-dial function or the redial function to execute the dialing of a number.

But it can also be that the phone is in a pocket of, say, a jacket, and a button or series of buttons are accidentally pressed.

Or, it could be that the phone is in a purse that contains many other items and the butt-dialing phenomenon occurs. Of course, the purse is likely over-packed with lots of stuff. Wife's purse contains lots of stuff ... like checkbooks, wallets, keys, make-up, hand sanitizer, playing cards, sunglasses, vampire books, excess napkins from Subway, fuzz-covered peppermints, sporks, crayons, sandwiches, folding umbrella, pills, small dogs, bricks, screwdrivers, wrenches, loaded weapons, treasure maps, jars of screws, radios, TVs, melted Snickers bar, spare tire, banjo ... you know, a typical woman's purse.

Yesterday, after lunch -- Wife and I usually do that together; I drive to her place of work, pick her up, and we go eat, I drop her back at work -- as she was exiting the car, she gathered her purse and was exiting the car when suddenly, the radio of the car cut off, the sound replaced by a phone ringing.

The XM display switched to "CALL," which is odd, since not many people have or call my car number. Explained to Wife that someone was calling, told her "bye," and pressed the phone button. That's when the feedback started -- the tsh-tsh-tsh that happens when microphone and speaker are too close but delayed slightly, not the high-pitched squeal from real-time mic-speaker interaction. The feedback stopped when she shut the door, confirming it was her phone calling the car.

So, it wasn't really a butt-call. It was a purse call.

I'm not sure I want to take a call from her purse. That purse is scary. And I'm uncertain what in that purse might be calling. Probably some sparkly vampire character in some paperback.

I'd rather get a call from her butt. I think. Maybe not if it actually spoke, come to think of it.

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