Friday, June 15, 2012

MST3K: Episode 612 - The Starfighters

I'm watching all of the Mystery Science Theater 3000 episodes in order. More about that here and here.

Episode 612: The Starfighters

First aired: Comedy Central on 29 October 1994
Availability: iTunes, Amazon Instant Video, Amazon (Volume 12), Rhino (Volume 12), Best Brains (Volume 12)

Into the Wild Blue Yonder!
The United States Air Force.

The thought of the power and destruction the Air Force can rain down upon the enemy is amazing. The powerful planes that streak across the skies. The crews that plan and execution their mission. The entire operation and results from the Air Force give an American a great sense of pride. Yes, the United States Air Force rules the skies wherever they go.

Even the Air Force Song conveys the strength and power of that branch of the Armed Services.
Off we go into the wild blue yonder, climbing high into the sun. Here they come, zooming to meet our thunder. At 'em boys! Give 'er the gun! Down we dive, spouting our flame from under. Off with one helluva roar! We live in fame or go down in flame. Nothing can stop the U.S. Air Force!
But, the Air Force used to have another song. Remember that one?
They took the blue from the skies and a pretty girl's eyes and a touch of Old Glory's hue, and gave it to the men who proudly wear the U.S. Air Force blue.
Not quite as impressive, is it? Harmless little ditty, but not quite on par with The Marine Hymn, Anchors Aweigh, or The Army Song. Not like The Air Force Song (Wild Blue Yonder).

This movie is like that.

Yes, there are some scenes of Lockheed F-104 aircraft in flight and practicing missions "spouting ... flame from under." And refueling. And refueling again.

Yes, the F-104 served the Air Force for over a decade, and was used by NASA into the 1990s. But, we get treated to refueling.

And more refueling.

And then they refuel some more. And ... well, they make flying boring.

Crow and Servo debrief Mike. Literally.The United Servo Academy Men's Chorus
A couple of pilots arrive at an Air Base named George to learn to fly F-104s, especially how to refuel them, only one of them, played by a future Congressman, is the son of a Congressman and Pops keeps calling and bothering everybody because he wants Junior to fly bombers, but Junior meets a girl from Iowa and gets assigned to Europe, tells Pops to back off, and everybody lives happily ever after, except for the people the Air Force blows the hell out of. The end.

Servo and Mike dance.
Bob Dornan, who was elected to Congress in 1977, played the Congressman's son.

The movie's actually kinda boring. Oh, sure, there are some scenes where the Starfighters tear the hell out of some practice targets on the ground, but they are of a documentary type of film, not an entertainment film. So, the lack of entertainment is understandable. But, yes, they do show very realistic scenes, because they're real. And, yes, planes do need to refuel. We just don't need to see it. Not that much of it.

There are a couple of Host Segments that are enjoyable. Of course, the United Servo Academy Men's Chorus is a treat. And Crow and Servo debriefing Mike by ... removing his briefs. And, then there's Servo trying to log on to the "Information Superhighway" in the opening. I remember those days.

A good episode with a boring movie, lots of fun riffing, and fun segments.

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