Friday, October 10, 2008

Horny vampires in the house

The Wife has discovered books by Stephenie Meyer. And she's dove into them with everything she's got. Not sure what got her started on the first one, "Twilight," but one night, she plopped down in her chair, tossed me the remote (unusual in and of itself), opened a book, and started reading. She read it at every chance. Something about teenagers and vampires, best as I can tell. Anyway, before she was done, went to Amazon.com and bought the entire series: "New Moon," "Eclipse," and "Breaking Dawn." Before they came in, she borrowed book 2 from a friend and read it. And then read the next two when the Amazon.com shipment arrived. Then, went to the store and bought another book by Meyer. Now, she's going through Stephenie Meyer withdrawal. She's even agreeing to go to the movies with me -- which I love doing; she hates doing it -- just so she can watch the big screen trailer for "Twilight" (in theatres November 21st, she's informed me). So, what to do? What to do? As it turned out, she's looking for more vampire books. She's reading something now called "One Bite With A Stranger." It ain't no Stephenie Meyer book. It's Harlequin Romance meets Dracula. When she reads it, she gets this ... look ... on her face. She'll put her hand up to her mouth, her eyes will get big and narrow at the same time (quite a trick, try it). Here's a random passage:
Lisette the Slavic Slut had happened, Reggie acknowledged, trying very hard not to picture the little blond bimbo bent over Greg's desk with her skirt hiked around her waist and her G-string tangled around her ankles. Reggie had been late date with Greg and hadn't thought anything about walking right into his office when she saw Lisette's empty desk. She thought the woman had been taking a break. Instead, she'd been taking it doggy-style from Reggie's fiancé.
Well! I don't know if she's going to get the rest of that series, "The Others." And I don't know how I feel about it. Depends, I guess, on whether she gets any good ideas.

2 comments:

  1. Unholy sludbuckets, Batman. The thought of vampire porn has left me mentally scarred for afterlife. And waiting for the DVD.

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  2. Sorta Blogless Sunday Pinup...

    Happy Sunday! Yet another fantastic day in America. Today’s pinup model, done by Gil Elvgren, entitled Keeping Posted, is wondering who all these people are who are getting letters in her mailbox from the Board of Elections
    What is happening in ...

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