Government way of doing things

In the Army, I found that things, the way government regulations require things be done, sometimes things got unnecessarily complicated. Let me give you an example.

Suppose you received a document and initialed it on the line where it indicated that it should be initialed. Like this:

ABC

Now, suppose that you received it in error, or initialed it where someone else should have initialed it. What do you do?

You erase the initials and initial the erasure.

Let me explain.

To "erase" something, you draw a single line through it, then you initial your erasure. Like this:

ABC ^ABC

So, if you initial something in error, you can correct it if you erase your initials and initial your erasure.

I admit, there's a certain logic to this. But step back for a minute and look at it in the whole scheme of things. It's silly.

The fact of the matter is, things sometimes go wrong. I mean, if people are involved, things can go wrong.

Government involvement doesn't accommodate certain things. Like errors. Or common sense.

And that's the real irony of liberals and their desire for government to "help." Liberals say that they truly care about people. Or snail darters. Or baby seals. Or Gaia. And they want to use the government to make it all better. Like the government is your mommy taking care of your skint knee.

That's why the idea to let government run things -- car companies, banks, health care -- is a bad idea.

Your mommy cares. Government regulations don't care.

Thoughts for 2009-07-11

Things on my mind recently...

• Drunk, diarrhetic badger disrupts Berlin traffic http://tr.im/rShp Bruno returns home #


• UK police probe Gitmo torture claims http://tr.im/rSjG No word on UK police involvement in Jackson death investigation #


• Cab Driver Beheads Self in Bizarre Suicide http://tr.im/rSmi Finally! Proof that crazy people are crazy #


• Buckingham Palace Sets Up Twitter http://tr.im/rSqC The Twitter has officially become uncool #


• Polish Woman Sues Egyptian Hotel Claiming 13-Year-Old Daughter Got Pregnant From Swimming Pool http://tr.im/rSr0 WTF?! #


• Astronaut Couple in Controversial Love Triangle Engaged http://tr.im/rStw Astrosluts are finally tying the knot #


• Study: Ugly men more fertile, produce more sperm during sex http://tr.im/rSu5 I suspect there's a seed of truth to that study #


• Study: Ugly men more fertile, produce more sperm during sex http://tr.im/rSu5 Actually, my first thought was "come again?" #


• Giants' Sanchez tosses no-hitter http://tr.im/rSGE Saw him pitch in the minors in 2005. He had potential. Obviously. #


• I just took "What stereotype do you fit?" and got: Prep! Try it ➔ http://bit.ly/V5W5i #


• I just took "What kind of Republican are you?" and got: Fiscal Conservative! Try it ➔ http://bit.ly/jWi5P #


• Wife has ordered and read dozens of supernatural romance books. I don't understand. And, no, I don't want you to explain it to me. #


• With THOUSANDS of supernatural romance books on Amazon, there is a market there. Let me try: "It was a dark and stormy night..." #

Follow me at http://twitter.com/basilsblog.

Thoughts for 2009-07-10

Things on my mind recently...

• "Soylent Green is made from soylent!" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Mrs. Robinson, you're really horny, aren't you?" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "If you build it, he will wonder what the hell you were thinking" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "A census taker once tried to test me. I ate his liver with some potato chips and a Diet Coke." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Today, I consider myself the unluckiest man on the face of the earth." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "I believe in long, slow, deep, soft, wet showers that last three days." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "You'll shoot your foot off" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "The dingo took my wallet" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Sarah barracuda nikto!" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Hoke, you're my best driver." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Gobble, gobble, we accept her, part of out group, part of our group." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife, and I am very displeased with that." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "I know it was you, Fredo. You broke my toys" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Wherever there's a cop beatin' up a guy, I'll be videotaping it." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "You're a better kisser than I am, Gunga Din." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "You confuse me." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "He's Spartacus!" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "I have come here to chew bubble gum and kick ass, and I'm all out of ass." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "To infinity and ... well, that just about covers it" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Lions and tigers and bears, oh will any of them reach the playoffs this year?" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Of all the American-owned, Nazi-occupied African night clubs frequented by resistance cells, she walks into mine." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Tell 'em to go out there with all they got and win just one for the dead guy." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Listen to them, children of the night; what music they have on their iPods." #1stdraftmovielines #


• ""I feel the need—the need for wind in my hair and 80s music playing in the background." #1stdraftmovielines #


• Ackk! Overslept! Running way late! #


• Driver seems to never have backed up with a trailer before. And on a day I'm running late. http://sml.vg/QUpgPC #


• Stupid people should not work on Fridays. They ruin it for the rest of us. #


• Just got a call fom insurance company of guy that backed into me in April. They've reconsidered and are NOT denying the claim. #


• Somebody threw away a perfectly good meth lab http://tr.im/rOW7 #


• It was Cow Appreciation Day ... and I missed it http://tr.im/rOYN #


• Newsweek: Obama a better Catholic than the Pope http://tr.im/rP1s What's next? Obama more Christian than Christ? #TCOT #


• 10 dumb iPhone apps http://tr.im/rP47 #


• I just took "Which US President are you?" and got: Abraham Lincoln! Try it ➔ http://bit.ly/PMCIM #

Follow me at http://twitter.com/basilsblog.

Warning: Warning labels are stupid

We need to quit put warning labels on things.

I wasn't sure about this for a while, but I'm totally convinced now.

Instructions are fine. I believe in instructions. When people ask me stupid questions about using something or following a process, I usually ask them what the instructions said. The blank stare tells me they didn't read the instructions.

Instructions are good things. I like them. But, if you can do things without instructions, that's fine. Some people can. For some things, I can. Depends on the thing.

But instructions aren't warning labels. There's a difference.

Warning labels are for stupid people.

The classic example is the lawsuit against McDonald's where the lady spilled coffee in her lap. She sued McDonald's because when she ordered hot coffee, she was given hot coffee. That was hot.

So, now when you buy McDonald's hot coffee, the cup says "Caution: HOT!" That'll keep it from burning.

And that ties in to my point (you didn't know I had one, did you?): Warning labels are stupid.

If you aren't smart enough to figure out that peanuts contain nuts (yes, that's a real warning), then you deserve whatever happens to you.

You see, stupid should hurt. That's how you learn things. Or, if you don't learn things, you at least keep the rest of entertained watching you get hurt.

If you don't know that you're not supposed to eat Mr Bubbles, you ought to get sick if you do. And it'd be your own fault.

If you put your fingers in the blades of a running fan, it should hurt. Stupid should hurt.

And, if you do something really stupid, and it kills you, well, that's a shame. A darn shame. And I'd feel bad for you. Until I got hungry. Then I'd go eat and forget about you and the stupid thing you did.

You see, one thing warning labels do is help keep stupid people from getting hurt. Or from dying.

Warning labels mean more stupid people. Here's how:

Stupid man reads a warning label and doesn't stick a screwdriver in a light socket, and lives.

Stupid woman reads a warning label and doesn't user her toaster in the bath, so she lives.

Stupid man and stupid woman, having so much in common, meet, fall in love, and have stupid kids. For some reason, stupid people figure out the having kids things.

Stupid kids grow up, and the cycle continues.

This is already happening.

We've had warning labels on things long enough that we're a generation or two into the overcrowding of America by stupid people. You want proof? Here you go: they elected Barack Obama.

We need to find a way to get rid of all the warning labels. That way, we'll start reducing the number of stupid people, either by attrition or by them learning, by experience, to not do stupid stuff.

Unless we get rid of warning labels, we'll just have more and more stupid people around, and things will only get worse.

You have been warned.

Thoughts for 2009-07-09

Things on my mind recently...

• Who can be hurt by Palin's recent decision? Palin. Who will be hurt by Obama's actions? Everyone. Why the focus on Palin? #tcot #


• Secret to How Dinosaurs Got So Big Is Revealed http://tr.im/rxi6 65-million year old box of Wheaties discovered #


• Doctor: Michael Jackson Was an Addict http://tr.im/rxma That makes his fans addict addicts. Which explains a lot. #


• TiVo says it recorded Robot Chicken. When I play it, it's Squidbillies. Does TiVo hate me? Or Adult Swim programming department? #


• Now TiVo recorded Metalocalypse instead of ATHF. I think I'm paying a visit to Williams Street. #


• State Suit Challenges U.S. Defense of Marriage Act http://tr.im/rxr4 Suddenly, liberals agree with the 10th Amendment? #tcot #


• Atlanta traffic rated 3rd worst in nation, behind LA, DC http://tr.im/rxuH So why would I rather drive in Atlanta than Chicago? The drivers. #


• Who knows where the bodies are buried in Chicago? No one knows any more: http://tr.im/rxwL #


• Amazon cuts Kindle price http://tr.im/rxyo BK cuts cheeseburger prices http://tr.im/rxyF Strangest price war ever #


• No flyover for Christian festival http://tr.im/rxA9 Maybe if they were told it was for an Obama photo-op #tcot #


• FLOTUS carries $6000 purse http://tr.im/rxBc Apparently the economy is doing very well #tcot #


• Ohio family attacked because they are White http:/tr.im/ryw7 Hating Whites isn't a crime #tcot #


• Congress needs to learn: All throwing money at a problem does is make for an expensive problem. #tcot #


• 5-year-old man have witnessed parents' murder-suicide http://tr.im/rB8F #


• 5-year-old may have witnessed parents' murder-suicide http://tr.im/rB8F #


• More spelling errors plague Obama releases http://tr.im/rDWm Spelling skills no better than math skills #tcot #


• Yippie-ki-yay, you bad, bad person! #1stdraftmovielines #


• Frankly, my dear, I haven't though about it #1stdraftmovielines #


• I'm gonna make him an offer he'll probably agree to #1stdraftmovielines #


• Toto, I've got a feeling we're not where I'm used to being #1stdraftmovielines #


• All right, Mr. DeMille, I'm ready for you to bring the camera in all the way so my face takes up the screen #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Synthetic or semisynthetic organic amorphous solid materials suitable for the manufacture of industrial products" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "I'll get you, my pretty, plus that canine you have" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Hello, Adrian" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Shane. Shane. Please return!" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "We'll always have that city in France." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Round up the usual people we round up." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Love means never having to say 'oops, my bad.'" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "I really don't think you want to hear the truth" #1stdraftmovielines #


• What we've got here is ... trouble understanding each other #1stdraftmovielines #


• Yes, it was the airplanes killed the beast #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Mom, Dad, Sis, and I really appreciate this." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "What a really awful-looking place." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "A boy's best friend is his psychotic personality." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "You're dead, and that's why I see you." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "I am traveling by foot across this intersection!" #1stdraftmovielines #


• "You know how to whistle, don't you? You just put your lips together and expel air at a high rate of speed." #1stdraftmovielines #


• The way ya lollygaggin' around here with them picks and them shovels, you'd think it was a 120 degree. And it might be. #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Forget it, Jake, it's the Hamptons." #1stdraftmovielines #


• "Secure your restraints, we may encounter some uneven circumstances this evening" #1stdraftmovielines #


• Trying to watch Warehouse 13. I hope it's better than the SciFi Channel's new name #


• TiVo has (in Suggestions) a History Channel show on Gamma Ray Bursts, and how they can destroy the Earth. I'll sleep comfy tonight. #


• 1939: Wizard of Oz, Gone with the Wind, Stagecoach, Mr. Smith goes to Washington; 2009: Transformers 2, Paul Blart: Mall Cop #


• When the legend becomes fact, print the talking points #1stdraftmovielines #


• Squeal like a kitten #1stdraftmovielines #


• Why don't ya come up some time and we'll have a nice little visit #1stdraftmovielines #


• My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare for me to express my extreme displeasure. #1stdraftmovielines #


• You keep using that word. I do not think it means what you think it means. #1stdraftmovielines They actually got that line right first time. #


• NOT TO FORTY-NINE! #1stdraftmovielines #

Follow me at http://twitter.com/basilsblog.

Thoughts for 2009-07-08

Things on my mind recently...

• They could still do the Michael Jackson tour. Leave him in that gold casket, add Bubbles and the Elephant Man, and tour like King Tut. #


• Wallet Stolen in 1982 Found in Central Park Tree http://tinyurl.com/mc6tl7 How could the victim not notice a tree stealing his wallet? #


• Secret Service Website taken out by Cyber attack http://tr.im/rl3z Thank goodness it didn't interfere with Jacko's funeral #tcot #


• Did SciFi change its name to SyFy because so many of their viewers couldn't spell "SciFi"? Or did they lose a bet with Spike? #


• Okay, first SciFi is now SyFy. Now, TiVo's CN/Adult Swim schedule is all buggered up. I blame the Jacko funeral coverage. #


• Google announces a new operating system, available in 2010, and runs on top of Linux http://tr.im/rlb6 Or you could just get Linux now #


• Need Some Weed? Just Check Twitter http://tr.im/rliR Does this mean that Twitter is a gateway app that could lead to (gasp) blogging? #


• Microsoft Warns of Serious Browser Security Problem http://tr.im/rlmq In other words, it's Tuesday #


• Daily Dose of Caffeine May Cure Alzheimer's, Scientists Find http://tr.im/rloB If true, I'm good until 2058 #


• Jesus is open for business http://sml.vg/5tozYG #


• Two Columbus escapees captured in Las Vegas http://tr.im/rnLQ Seems what happens in Vegas doesn't always stay in Vegas #


• Even T. Boone Pickens says wind power blows http://tinyurl.com/labmdk #


• Maybe they're sending Biden to Ohio to improve Obama's numbers, thinking Obama will look smart in comparison http://tr.im/rnSi #tcot #


• Just drove past a guy riding a bicycle, carrying a vacuum cleaner. Miss Gulch's brother has dumped the broom and gone high-tech. #


• I wonder how many people who say they wouldn't vote for Palin now, would actually have before last Friday anyway. #tcot #


• This must be the lines that carry the wood for Red Lobster's wood-fired grill. http://sml.vg/DIu6yd #


• Lunch at the Red Lobster. And they got Michael Frikkin' Jackson on the "news" channel on the TV. Life sucks. #


• Good news for Obama: His approval rating is still better than Hitler's. In most polls, at least. #tcot #


• Hey! If I drive across the river to Central Time, I'll be able to do 12:34:56 7/8/09 again! #


• "An exciting new Chevron is coming soon." And nothing says excitement like a Chevron station! http://sml.vg/4KzvUm #


• White House spells POTUS' name wrong http://tr.im/rsnZ They keep putting a "B" in place of the "S" #


• Dallas PD cuts security for home of former president Bush http://tr.im/rtDz But bankrupt LA can provide security for Jackson funeral #tcot #


• Naked man shows up for dental appointment http://tr.im/rtPH Dentist refuses to fill his cavity #


• Oscar Mayer dies http://tr.im/rtWF Will his body be carried to the cemetery in the Weinermobile? #

Follow me at http://twitter.com/basilsblog.

Thoughts for 2009-07-07

Things on my mind recently...

• POTUS: The future does not belong to those who gather armies ... or plant missiles http://tr.im/reKg Peace Moonbeam speaks in Moscow #tcot #


• Good news: Pizza Hut for lunch. Bad news: They have TV on showing Jacko's funeral. Good news: They are finally burying that SOB. #


• Some news head just said they'd be covering Jacko's funeral for "many more hours." #


• If Moses was trying to free his people today, he'd threaten Pharaoh with non-stop Michael Jackson funeral coverage. #


• As much as I've been fighting to stay awake in this meeting, at least they aren't showing PowerPoints of Michael Jackson. Yet. #


• Day-long Meeting From Hell is done. Anybody heard anything about Michael Jackson's funeral. Isn't it today? #


• New monkey discovered in Brazilian Amazon http://tr.im/rieq Brazilian Amazon really likes her new monkey #


• Wife has had a poopy day at work. I've been dealing with jackasses. Heading home, we're encountering every poopy jackass driver in town. #


• I have no idea what that song is playing in this Chinese restaurant, but I think the words go "the line broke, the monkey got choked..." #


• Wife wants to stop at PetSmart to get some fish conditioner. I don't know what that is, but I don't think Miss Clairol makes it. #


• 40 people watch Jacko's funeral at Columbus theatre http://tinyurl.com/n3dmt7 I'm happy there are only 40 of those idiots in town. #


• They have a Code*Adam sign on the door at PetSmart. Shouldn't they also have a Code*Lassie sign, too? #


• Hell! Even XM 70s On 7 is talking about Michael Jackson. Time to listen to Lionel Hampton and Artie Shaw on 40s On 4 #


• Would Michael Jackson's funeral have been a big a deal if it happened before he went ape-shit crazy? #


• There were some jackasses on the road this afternoon. I could hardly drive and Tweet without getting run over. Geesh! #


• I TiVo the two local news programs at 6:00 every night. Watching them now. Since when did Michael Frikkin' Jackson become a local story! #


• Sent Wife a text message earlier today: I <3 U. She wanted to know what the hell "I is less than 3 U" has to do with anything. #


• Wait until Al Sharpton finds out they didn't have a riderless horse at Michael Jackson's funeral. #


• Wife put some small plants in new aquarium a couple of weeks ago. It now looks like a Stephen King story in there with all that growth. #


• Watching Wizard Of Oz. Now, if I can only find my copy of Dark Side Of The Moon. #

Follow me at http://twitter.com/basilsblog.