Tuesday, August 14, 2007

The Surreal Life: WuzzaDem

Previously ... on "The Surreal Life"...

Even though I'm not making pornos like Screech, I'm still in demand. My fans love me.

Ohhhh!!! I never did porn. But I do screech a lot!

Well, having that regular gig at WuzzaDem means I'll never have to do porn again.

I got my name back when I did porn.

You mean that "Wolf Blitzer" isn't your real name?

Are you kidding? If I had that name as a child, I'd have been beaten up and had my lunch money taken every day at school. And I'd have grown up being a self-absorbed ass who was trying to compensate for having an inferiority complex.

If I'd have been beaten up at school every day, I could have ended up working for Jimmy Carter.

Ha! That's nothing. I might have ended up with multiple personalities.

Yeah, you are lucky about that.

Very lucky.

I know how lucky I am to have my job at WuzzaDem. If it wasn't for John, I'd still be working for the Hangman.

I used to be a hangman. Great job. Place the hood, adjust the rope, pull the lever. Bye bye!

I'm really fortunate. The job at WuzzaDem is a great job. But at least I have a skill to fall back on if, God forbid, it ever end.

Well, personally, I don't like that WuzaDem guy. He makes fun of me.

Well, you can't fault him for that. I mean, have you ever looked in the mirror?

You're someone to talk.

Look, fellas, I can't stand all this drama. John gave me a job after Microsoft kicked me to the curb. I went to Apple to find work. I asked PC Guy for a recommendation, but he acted like he didn't even know me. John was nice enough to help me out when I was down and out.

Yeah, you're right. Helluva guy. Here's to John!

To John.

To John.

To John.

And to Mrs. R...

And now, tonight ... on "The Surreal Life" ...

The paper's here!

WTF??!! John's closing up shop?

Shop? I like to shop!

No, you ditzy broad! He's closing down WuzzaDem.

Does this mean he'll quit picking on me?

Oh, I'm sure others will pick up the slack.

Yeah, that's a given.

So, what are you guys gonna do now?

I've got my other job.

Speaking of which, I'm looking forward to filming some more scenes with you, "Wolf."


  1. The Last WuzzaDem Post: An Episode of Mission Impossible in Which the Recording in the Opening Scene Was Made By Jim Phelps' Elderly Grandfather...

    "Good morning, Mr. Phelps." ... ... ... ... ... "What, you can't say "good morning" to your own grandfather?" And on that rather lame note, we're hanging up the "Closed" sign. I hate to be picky, but do you have...

  2. John: Thank you. And not just for those kind words. But for WuzzaDem and all. Now THAT was excellent.

  3. Basil, thank you. I agree with Mr. John. That was excellent!

  4. [...] Basil’s Blog offers an excellent tribute to the WuzzaDems. [...]

  5. Thank you all for the kind words. I really do appreciate them. But the thanks goes to John and Mrs. R. for one of the ... Best. Blogs. Ever.

  6. [...] “fumetti” and “sock puppet elaborator” just didn’t work right.) Basil pays tribute in the most effective manner. We’ll miss you, [...]


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