Thursday, September 23, 2010

Whatever you do, don't call your wife a purple blob

I've worn glasses most of my life. I'm near-sighted. Very, very near-sighted. Without my glasses, everything over a distance of 3-5 feet away looks like blobs of color.

So, this morning, right after I stepped into the shower, I realized something I needed to ask The Wife.

Although we will often car-pool, today she was planning to drive separate. And, when I thought of what I needed to ask, I was concerned that she might leave before I finished the shower. And, since it would impact her route to work, depending on her answer, I stepped out of the shower, grabbed my robe, walked through the bedroom, and opened the door to the living room.

Notice that I did not say that I picked up my eyeglasses.

So, when I opened the door, I was pretty much blind. I could see shapes and colors, and that's about all. She was sitting in a dark rocker-recliner, wearing dark pants, and a purple top.

I asked her what I needed, and she agreed. Only, she agreed by nodding her head. I think. I saw some movement of a shape and color, but couldn't be sure if it was a nod yes or shake no.

"I can't tell if you nodding your head or shaking your head. All I see is a purple blob," I said.

I couldn't see the look on her face, but I could hear it in her voice when she said "Yes."

I had never known that "yes" could be such a terrifying word.

If you wear glasses, wear them. Avoids all kinds of unpleasantness. Trust me on this.


  1. Nyuk! I'll try to remember that, Basil. Trust me, I will.

  2. Oh! I spit my coffee while reading this! LOL! Bless her heart. I completely understand your not being able to see without your glasses, but I also completely understand her terrifying "YES"


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