Wow! Shutdown is worse than Sequester.
Wait. Sequester is still going on, right? So we have Sequester AND Shutdown? Arrgghh! How will we survive it?
Already, the moon broke loose from its orbit and is crashing into the sea sometime this afternoon. Plus, in case you missed it, the sun didn't turn on this morning.
Also, iPhones aren't working. Android phones, either. Only BlackBerry phones work during Shutdown. Who saw that coming?
Traffic lights are out. Buildings are collapsing. Breaking Bad won't be airing. It's pandemonium.
Worst of all, the Internetz are down, and you can't even read this brilliant post.
What can we do?
You can't call on the military to defend us as Shutdown roams the streets of America and destroys the pieces of our country that Sequester left standing.
We're doomed, I tell ya. Doomed.