Monday, February 18, 2008

The shadow knows

I need to go on a diet.

I mean, I know it. Anyone who looks at me knows it.

In high school, I was 6'2'' and weighed 120 lbs.


I'm no taller, but a heckuva lot heavier.

And, I know that I need to drop a few pounds.

A light came on and told me.

No, not one of those "AHA!" moments where people say "a light came on."

An actual light came on.

It happened at work.

Now, I don't normally talk about work. This blog and my job ain't got nothing to do with each other. I don't blog at work, and I don't blog about work.

But still, something happened at work.

Only, it's got nothing to do with work. Other than it happened to be the place that the light came on.

Let me explain.

We got some of those movement-activated lights. Motion detectors. You know what I'm talking about.

The idea, I suppose, is that if someone walks out of a room and leaves a light on, if no movement happens, the light will go off, even though the switch is in the "on" position.

Oh, and if a large mass moves in the room, the light will come on.

Well, there's several rooms like that at work. And, I'll walk past several of these each day.

Today, I walked past a dark room. The room was on my right. Windows were on my left. And, a shadow was cast on the wall to my right. And when I walked past that particular room, my shadow was in the room.

When I walked past it today, the light came on.

I didn't enter the room. I wasn't even up against the wall.

But my shadow apparently was heavy enough to cause the light to come on.

And, yes, I know. If I'm so heavy that my shadow sets off a motion detector, it's time to call Jenny Craig.

So, I guess I'm going on a diet.

Starting tomorrow.

Or the next day.


  1. I have just one question, were you on your cell phone when you went by the room? If you were, there is definitely the possibility that interference made the light come on. Because pretty much all activity sensors can pick that up. So eat you some real ice cream and blame it on the phone. That's what I always do.

  2. Unfortunately, no.

    An alternative reason could be that my walking shook the building so much that things in the room moved, causing the light to come on.

    But, that's no better. I has gots to lose some weight, no doubt about it.

  3. Well, if you are just bound and determined to do it, might I suggest the cigarette and espresso diet? I have dropped sixteen pounds in the last six weeks.


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