Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Little German car

A couple of weeks ago, someone backed into my car. His fault.

And trying to deal with USAA insurance has been a pain. A huge pain.

First, when I contacted USAA, they didn't return my calls and haven't decided that they are responsible.

Harsh words were said. By me. I gave them a piece of my mind. Which I need to be careful about doing, because I don't have all that much to begin with.

Anyway, after several calls, they finally decided they needed to pay for fixing my car ... and to furnish me a rental during downtime.

Maybe I'll give all the details about what all I had to say about their operation. Maybe.

But, right now, they're fixing the car. And set me up with a rental.

Now, my car is an older vehicle. A Chevrolet Lumina. They don't make those any more.

But, it's a car. Not what I would call a large car, but it's big enough for my fat ass.

And they told Enterprise (who, like they advertise, will pick you up) to hook me up with a standard car.

Well, "standard" doesn't mean a car that's ... well ... my size.

It means a Volkwagen Jetta.

It's a little German car.

Insofar as it seems to be built to hold little Germans, not a full-sized American like me.

Not a bad car, to be sure. But smaller than I like.

The seat pokes me in the kidneys. I don't think it's on purpose. But still, it pokes me there. It's supposed to wrap slightly around me, I suppose. But since I'm wider than the seat, I feel the car seat poking me.

The brakes work. Very well. Takes a lot of getting used to. But I'm getting better at it. I no longer feel like I'm going to crash through the windshield when I step on the brakes.

It's got a big trunk, though. Looks like it would hold 3 bodies.

And it's black. Jet black. Maybe it's Jetta Black, I don't know.

Actually, it only looks black. To me.

It seems to be invisible to every one else. Twice today, asses driving other vehicles ran red lights and nearly hit me.

Maybe they don't like German cars. Or little Germans.

Or, maybe they're just dumbasses who can't drive.

I'd just as soon not get in a wreck until I get rid of this little rental car.

Actually, I'd just as soon not get in a wreck at all. I wish everyone felt that way.


  1. Basil, I hope you do not have an accident with your rental car, but you will be well-protected if you do. Jettas are robust cars with six or eight airbags, depending on the model, and have excelled in crash tests.

    I am a big guy, and I have plenty of room in the seat of a Jetta I had occasion to drive recently. Maybe the buffet visits have been getting out of hand recently? Nah, that can't be it, must be smaller seats on those rental models.

  2. LOL Basil, I hope you won't have to drive the little car for long. I've met you so I do know what you are talking about. I have a Jetta but then again, I'm little (oh ok short) and my ancestry is there ya have it. LOL

  3. You fat ass Basil, start eating fiber, become a vegetarian. You will get a lot of respect here in California, where I reside.
    You also will gain: 1. selfrighteousness
    2. flatulence
    3. long life - that is, if you avoid accidents.

  4. Me? Become a Vegan?

    Didn't we beat them back in the 80s? Marc Singer led the Earth to victory, didn't he?

  5. Yeah, I wish everyone ELSE wanted to avoid accidents, too. Truer words have rarely been spoken.


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