Monday, December 13, 2004

Someone Has A Case Of The Mondays

Back to work today. It's a Monday. Oh, wait, you knew that, didn't you? Well, didn't you? Yeah, I thought so. So, to fight traffic and make my way to the Evil Corporation and contribute to their plans to bring down society. Hey, it's a living.

But, like I was saying, back to work. And, it's about time. I can use the break. You ever have one of those weekends where you're busier than during the week? Or where it seems that way? Well, do you? That's what I thought. There's nothing quite like waking up at 6:00 AM on a Saturday to drive 2½ hours for a 20 minute event. I left so early because you never know how good directions are. Only missed one turn this time. Last time I went to one of these things, I missed the same turn 5 times. Anyway, I had no trouble -- or at least, not nearly as much trouble -- finding the place. So, I got there early. Two hours early. So, I scoped the place out and went and ate breakfast. Again. See, I ran through the drive-thru at McDonald's when I left home before 7:00. So, around 9:00, I found another Mickey-D's and ate again. No, the diet's not going too well. Then, after standing in the cold for the event (and, yes, it was a worthwhile event), I left. Stay with me, now, I'm getting to my point.

Getting back near home, I stopped by the local Circuit City [shameless link - buy stuff] to get a new mouse for my laptop. But, you know what? It's a weekend in December. And there's traffic. A boatload of traffic. Traffic out the ... well, you get my point. So, anyway, after getting the mouse (it wasn't on the shelf, they had to find some more in the back, but they're good that way), I saw someone I had to give a check to. He didn't really want me to bother him while he was shopping, but when you go out in public and I'm on the loose, you takes your chances. Hey, he could have gone to the event. But he's smarter than that. I got him back though. Anyway, I got back in traffic and made it back to the house.

Wife was coming the other way in the truck on her way to town, so I had the house to myself. King of my domain. Master of all I see. Until I realized she saw me and had turned around. She came in and set me straight about the order of things around here, then went to Sears [shameless link - buy stuff. Yes, I know it's a K-Mart link. K-Mart bought Sears. So there.].

Anyway, I finally had the house to myself. All by myself. Don't need anyone. Self-sufficient, I am. So I turned on the laptop and logged on to the Internet. Not much happening, so I called my big sister. She's the one that's 5'4" tall. My little sister is 6'0" tall. Got another sister. Never knew what to call her. "Little sister" was taken by the 6'0" sister. Maybe the 6'0" one is the baby sister and the other is the little sister. Or, maybe she's the middle sister. She's 5'6" so that will fit. We used to call her the mean one. Maybe we still will. I had a point, but I don't remember what it was.

Anyway, the wife came back, then we went to supper ... at McDonald's. Great. Later that night, we took one of the grandchildren to the Christmas Hayride. It's done by the same people who do the Hallowe'en Hayride. Got to cover both sides, I guess. When the end of the world comes, they'll be able to say, "But, every year, I did a Hayride just for your special day," and they could say that to Jesus or Satan. Sorry, Mohammed, Buddha, and the rest of you. You should have come up with something that could be turned into crash commercialism, and we'd have hayrides for you, too. It's your own fault. Anyway, the people who run the hayrides. Oh, yeah. I was going to make a comment about them doing one for both sides to cover their asses, but I guess they never read the ending of the book. I know who wins. One last thing about the hayride, I think they take the props they put up and paint different stuff on each side. Like angles on one side for Christmas, but a bat on the other side. Snowman on one side, scarecrow on the other. You get the idea. Santa? Just re-arrange the letters, remove the sack and give him a pitchfork. See?

Anyway, that was Saturday. And I slept funny, so my back bothered me all day Sunday, so Sunday was shot all to hell. Then, the wife wanted to eat Mexican Sunday night. So we did. Spent the rest of the night in the other part of the house violating the Geneva Convention. Until the phone rang about 10:00. Seems someone jumped the mother-in-law's fence and stole a Christmas tree from her yard. Of course, that meant riding up and down a bunch of county roads in the hope that someone low-life enough to steal a Christmas tree would be stupid enough to put it up in their yard. Stupid ususally goes hand-in-hand with sorry-no-good-low-life, so it's not as far-fetched as it sounds. Anyway, Sunday ended on a great note as you can tell. So, after getting back to the house, I ate (no, didn't affect the diet one bit) and went to sleep.

Boy, I'm glad it's Monday.

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