Saturday, December 18, 2004

Son of Return of Headline News

No Headline Fun™ from Frank J. at IMAO Saturday. So, I saved up for nothing. OR DID I?? Here's what I would have posted over there, for those that care.
From AJC:
30318: Atlanta ZIP code rates No. 1 for residents in state prisons
Award ceremony cancelled when award stolen

From AJC:
Inmates to Get Holiday Cheer From Radio
Gimme an I, gimme an N, gimme an M ...

From AJC:
Metro counties on 'dirty danger' list
'Dirty dancing' list was full

From AJC:
Jackets take time to work on skills individually
Still not quite grasping meaning of 'teamwork'

From AJC:
Consumer Prices Calm Down in November
Wants to get on Santa's "good" list

From AJC:
Safety tips keep holiday cheer burning bright
Try using fire

From CNN:
Two screeners reassigned over fake bomb incident
Roman Catholic bishop named new director of Homeland Security

From CNN:
Storm, not sub, sank 'spy' trawler
CBS Morning Show host sought for questioning

From CNNmoney:
Fannie execs could get pink slips
Will go well with matching bra, panties

From KSBW:
Grocery Workers' Union Prepares For Possible Strike
If followed by spare on last frame, will take trophy

From WESH:
Thousands Of Orange Trees Condemned
Florida jury goes on rampage

Sting Nabs Nearly 100 High-Profile Crooks
Gordon Sumner finds part-time work

From CNNmoney:
Amex sees $120M charge; axes 2,000
"Was always so quiet," neighbors say

From CNNmoney:
Refresh your computer
Really stupid person stuck on same page for 5 days

From CNN:
Kansas death penalty ruled unconstitutional
Roasting in Hell, Perry Smith, Dick Hickock appreciate the irony

From CNN:
Studies: Lost sleep equals gained weight
Researchers suprised how many calories are burned by snoring

From CNN:
Review: 'Aviator' a breathtaking epic
Young girls, homosexuals excited about Leo's new film

From CNN:
Review: 'Lemony Snicket' episodic, uneven
Reviewer sees first Jim Carrey film

From CNN:
Dogsledding a winter wilderness adventure
Maine's updated version of "Walking in a Winter Wonderland" failing to catch on

From CNN:
Europe air capacity outstrips demand
Wins competition to join Las Vegas show

Bama gets back in pads
Tampons didn't work out

From Washington Post:
Fetus Survives Killing of Mother
441-month old fetus arrested, charged

And that's the way it is. Courage.


  1. once again, too f*****g funny!

  2. That's appreciated. You don't know how much.

  3. See...somebody besides me thinks you are really funny. I TOLD you that you should send these in to a paper and start a column! You are indeed funnier than Dave Barry. Love, Big Sis (who's still 5'4")


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