Tuesday, February 8, 2005

I'm Looking Out For You!

The CBS station in Philadelphia, KYW-TV 3, is reporting that your money may be contaminated. (tip: Myopic Zeal)
Money that has been contaminated with a virus; it's a whole new possible direction for bioterrorism. It is a case that the FBI terrorism unit has taken over from state police that involves several cities, including Philadelphia. ...

Earlier this month, Pennsylvania State Troopers intercepted $250,000 dollars during a routine traffic stop. The alleged drug money, which had been sealed in plastic, was being driven from Columbus, Ohio to Northeast Philadelphia.

According to law enforcement sources, after counting the seized cash, troopers began feeling ill and one trooper was even hospitalized with flu-like symptoms. ...

(KYW's Tamsen) Fadal has learned that a warning has been issued at both the state and federal level, recommending that officers should take extra precaution and wear protective masks when handling suspected drug money, now more than ever.

(entire article here)

Scary stuff, huh? Well, do not fear. Here's a warning sign if the money in your pocket might be tainted. Look at the picture of the person on the bill. Underneath you'll see a name. If the person has one of the following names, take immediate steps!
  • Washington
  • Jefferson
  • Lincoln
  • Hamilton
  • Jackson
  • Grant
  • Franklin

If you find a bill with one of those names under the picture on the front, put the bills in a zip-lock bag and mail it immediately to my Official Tainted Money Reception Station:
OTMRS
P. O. Box 669
Columbus, GA 31902

I'll personally make sure the money is disposed of properly. I'm looking out for you!

UPDATE: Obviously great minds think alike.

4 comments:

  1. The Big Sister (who's 5'4")February 8, 2005 at 1:42 PM

    How considerate of you! Not everyone would be so altruistic, basil...
    MM hasn't yet taken you up on your job offer?

    ReplyDelete
  2. The Big Sister (who's 5'4")February 8, 2005 at 1:43 PM

    Well, it seems like I was typing with my toes in the post above...

    ReplyDelete
  3. The Mean Sister (who is 5'6")February 8, 2005 at 2:18 PM

    You know the second in command at the OTMRS has an office in Jesup. To protect the top level members in that office, I will put myself in harm's way and offer to dispose of it for them. I have connections with the local office.

    ReplyDelete
  4. i guess i'm safe 'cause i have no money....

    ReplyDelete

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