Wednesday, June 14, 2006

Keeping Tab

Remember Tab cola? It was Coca-Cola's diet drink before Diet Coke.

It always came in the 10 oz. bottles while Coke came in the 6-½ oz. bottles, so it was popular with cheap people. Like me. And my family.

Tasted like ... well, crap. Okay, maybe not literally like crap. But it tasted nasty. But still, for an extra 3-½ oz., you can put up with a lot.

Later on, when bottles became less popular, Tab showed up in cans. They had some odd pink-sort-of color. A really artificial color that could only exist in a laboratory. And it tasted the same way. Artificial.

After Coca-Cola released Diet Coke ... and Diet Coke rose to be the number three soft drink behind Coke and Pepsi ... it was hard to find Tab. At least, around here, it was.

In fact, I thought that Coca-Cola had quit making Tab. But then, one day, while planning a cookout party, I decided to have some fun and try to find odd stuff to have to drink. Like some off-brand drinks in addition to name-brand drinks.

That's when I ran across Tab again. Some grocery story ... Kroger, I think ... had it in the 2-liter bottle. So, I bought it for the cookout. And some laughed, "Oh, gosh! Tab!" And some liked it.

Later, looking further, I found it in cans. And bought it. For drinking, not for a gag.

And, every so often, I'll pick up a case of Tab to put in the fridge and have on hand. Not often, but once in a while.

But recently, I found something different. It's called Tab energy. It's "the deliciously pink 5 calorie energy drink created specifically for women with a sense of style and purpose."

I tried one yesterday. And you know what? I'm obviously not a "woman with a sense of style and purpose."

The lady I bought it from said it tasted fruity. But it doesn't.
Tab energy tastes like crap.

Well, not literally like crap.

Unless crap tastes like waking up in a patch of briars with some non-ripe berries in your mouth.

Not that I would know what that would taste like. But you get the idea.

Right now, Tab energy is at the top of my list of least-favorite drinks. Right above root beer.

12 comments:

  1. When I was younger I thought Fresca tasted nasty. Now it's not so bad.

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  2. Macker: Fresca was one of the drinks in my gag list of soft drinks for the cookout. And, like you, I remember it as tasting nasty. Wasnt bad, though. The new flavor Frescas Ive seen lately, though ... not a fan.

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  3. Yeah, Tab tastes like crap smells.

    I always preferred RC cola when I was a kid. I didn't do diet. Now, I'm one of those "women with a sense of style and purpose" and I say Diet Pepsi is da bomb.

    [heh]

    Does anyone even use that phrase anymore? Eh, no matter. I may have a sense of style, but in reality, I'm lacking on the purpose part. Besides, soda seems to have given me kidney stones. Bah!

    Drink water.

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  4. Stacy: I never could stomach Diet Pepsi. But you are correct. Water is best.

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  5. Hey now, don't mess with my root-beer; but I agree Tab is the worst! When I worked for the City Court Clerk's office in Macon, the Court Clerk drank it by the gallons. I hadn't seen or remembered Tab until I started working where I am now and one of our agents drinks it. YUCK my mouth is burning thinking about it actually!

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  6. Jo: I never could get used to root beer. I used to hate Dr Pepper, until I was in Korea and they ran out of Coke. But that story is for another day.

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  7. What about clear Tab? Tasted like "cola", looked like clear soda.

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  8. RockNTheFreeWorldJune 15, 2006 at 4:40 AM

    I have always hated Tab but actually like the Tab Energy. Kinda like a fruity sour cream soda. Of course my tastes have always been a little off anyway.

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  9. Tab Energy is complete garbage. I was an avid Tab drinker right up until the release of Coke Zero last summer, so I was intrigued when I saw the Tab Energy can. I bought one out of curiousity. After one sip I threw the can away.

    I used to work for a Coca-Cola Bottling facility. During the 90s they briefly experimented with Tab Clear. The taste wasn't terrible, but just like Coke's previous marketing blunder (*cough* New Coke *cough*) they completely alienated their target consumer. Tab Clear rotted on the shelves.

    When I can't find Coke Zero, I drink Tab. The trick to drinking Tab is it has to be good and cold.

    (As a former Coke employee, I probably shouldn't mention that the Tab formula is closer to the regular Coke formula than Diet Coke is. It is, but you didn't hear it from me.)

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  10. I heart diet dr pepper! Tab is awful--I didn't know it was still being made! Remember peanuts in a RC Cola?

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  11. Sarah: I never experienced Clear Tab. Lucky me.

    RockNTheFreeWorld: Ah, I knew they targeted it to somebody.

    Chris: Your secret is safe with me.

    Linda: Actually, we put peanuts in Coca-Cola. The small bag ... usually from Lance, although Tom's peanuts were good, too ... went in the small Coke bottle. We drank RC Cola. But with a Moon Pie.

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  12. If you want nasty soda, try birch beer sometime (it's a Pennsylvania thing). Nasty. Tastes like tums or rolaids.

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