Sunday, February 28, 2010

Tsunami watch ... and other news

Hawaii disappeared under the waves forever yesterday! What? Oh. Well, that's the message I got from the talking heads on TV about what was going to happen.

Wife wanted to know: When you evacuate Hawaii, where do you go? Indonesia?

Which makes more sense: watching news coverage of a wave heading to Hawaii, or watching a NASCAR race? Both are waiting for something bad to happen. Or nearly happen.

As I was watching, I wondered that, with the tsunami coming, if I be should be buying duct tape. Sure, I'm in the southeast US, 4 hours from the coast, but still...

And why didn't we have helicopters flying over the wave, watching it bear down on Hawaii? Don't news directors watch disaster movies?

If this tsunami had hit the Kapi'olani Medical Center in Honolulu, it might have destroyed Obama's original birth certificate. And there goes reelection!

I came up with a name for this tsunami: "Godot."

After a while, I realized that the whole wave heading to Hawaii thing was just an advertising ploy for Google Wave.

Did the scientists that predicted the Hawaii tsunami use IPCC data?

Maybe we should have named this tsunami "Obama" for it's big hype and small results.

I knew it was over when all the news head started talking about the killer whale again.

After a bit, I was looking for any channel still carrying the tsunami. I want to see death and destruction. Nothing. So, I watched The Three Stooges on teh TiVo.

In fairness, everything turned out okay. Obama asked Thomas Magnum and Steve McGarrett to help protect Hawaii from the wave. It worked.

Just the threat of a tsunami means that we MUST pass Obamacare. Or the Kyoto Treaty. Or something.

Report: Emergency shipment of condoms headed to Olympic athletes. Emergency? "Quick, dial 911. I need a rubber. NOW!!!"

Don Surber's comment was best: "Please hurry. We must not let them breed."

This cartoon is teh funneh.

Congressman John Smoltz? Yes, that John Smoltz.


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