No, my son doesn't read this little blog. So he won't get this message. So it's not really for him.
But my son is celebrating his birthday today. He's 19.
I debated whether or not to blog about this. Like I said, he doesn't read the blog. And I'm not sure just how much I want to say.
Like all parents, we have a relationship that's difficult at times. He's been in a difficult situation, though. I've contriubuted to that. But so has his mother. And his grandparents.
So I won't say much about our relationship, because some of it really hurts. It really hurts. And today isn't a day about that kind of stuff. It's about celebrating him.
Nineteen years ago today, November 15, 1986, my son was born. I was present for his birth, and remember seeing him and holding him for the first time. It was a special experience. Oh, same for my daughter, who's three years older than he. But it's his birthday today.
I could go on and on about our going to baseball games, travelling to football games, throwing the ball around in the yard, things like that.
It's hard to spend time with a child when you're in the military. And when you get that worked out but then go through a divorce, it's even more difficult.
So the times I spent with the children were special times. And they got less and less frequent as they grew.
I hardly see them anymore. But that's what happens with children.
But some days make you think long and hard about that. But when those days are birthdays, you smile through the tears.
You smile because of the joy the child brings to your world and to the entire world. You smile because of the times you remember, even if those days are gone. You smile because, deep down, you know that the child is grown and can handle anything. You smile because you love your child.
Happy birthday, son.